When the X-Men made their comic book debut in the pages of The X-Men in September 1963, readers could not have imagined the paradigm shift taking place between those pages. Up until this point superhero comics had been all about wish fulfillment. They were an outlet for kids (and other minorities who felt lacking in any sort of power worth having) -- in the pages of comics they could read about what it's like to wield phenomenal power. And the people wielding it were not the jocks and bullies who tormented them at school. They weren't cops or politicians exerting their will over the little guy. In comics, the guys wielding the power were shy, timid, unassuming men and women just like them.
But the X-Men offered readers something a little different. If Spider-Man (who was introduced a year earlier) taught readers that with great power came great responsibility, the X-Men taught them that power comes at a price. While Marvel's mutants had a host of incredible abilities, they were also misunderstood and feared at best and outright despised at worst. Moreover, a goodly portion of the X-Men's powers came with nightmarish physical deformities or painful and damaging consequences. Over the intervening decades, talented writers and artists have passed the baton to successive generations who have introduced readers to new mutant characters while adapting and reinventing old favorites. Although many of the X-Men have incredible powers that most of us would envy -- from super strength and flight to invisibility and phase shifting -- there are some mutant powers that absolutely nobody in their right minds could want.
19 CYCLOPS' OPTIC BLASTS
At first glance (pun semi-intended), you'd think this was a pretty cool power. The ability to summon a beam of pure kinetic energy at will would certainly be a boon if you were to dedicate your life to fighting crime (or industrial demolition). The trouble with Cyclops' powers is that unlike Superman's heat vision or Darkseid's Omega beams they cannot be summoned at will. They're a tap that can't be turned off.
To be endowed with Cyclops' powers would be to spend your life viewing the world through the prism of his ruby quartz visor; the only thing stopping his powers from wreaking carnage wherever he goes. Would you be prepared to spend the rest of your life without any color except red?
18 ZEITGEIST'S ACIDIC VOMIT
The recently released Deadpool 2 offered those unfamiliar with comics a first look at X-Force regular Zeitgeist, played by Pennywise himself, Bill Skarsgard. While the character didn't get all that much screen time in the movie, audiences saw enough of his powers to realize that they're not something they'd wish upon their worst enemies.
Zeitgeist's name would imply that he has some sort of time travel powers... but in actuality, his mutant ability allows him to vomit a seemingly endless stream of highly corrosive acid. If you were cursed with these powers, one bad curry would be all it took to make you destroy everything and everyone in the building.
17 JUGGERNAUT'S MOMENTUM
Despite being a regular in the superlative X-Men animated series of the '90s, his appearance in X-Men: The Last Stand and that ubiquitous internet meme, Juggernaut doesn't pop up all that often in Marvel Comics. As such, while his iconic helmet is familiar to casual fans, most are unaware that Cain Marko is in fact Charles Xavier's stepbrother and that his powers don't actually come from a mutation but from a magical gemstone.
For the uninitiated, Juggernaut becomes an unstoppable force of destruction as soon as he builds any momentum... which would be an absolute nightmare in daily life. Imagine breaking into a brisk jog to catch the bus to work and wiping out half the block. No wonder he doesn't get out much!
16 BANSHEE'S SCREAM
Picture the scene: You're in a crowded bar, desperate for the bartender to look past the thronging masses who elbow their to the front to where you've been waiting patiently for what feels like forever. Fortunately, he notices you and asks for your order with a sympathetic smile. You tell him your order and he cups his hand to his ear with a "wha?".
You raise your voice. He still can't hear you. So you take a deep breath and shout. A second later there's a crater the bartender (and the bar) used to be. That's what it must be like to be Sean Cassidy, whose mutant larynx is capable of creating devastating psionic waves. No thank you!
15 ROGUE'S PARASITIC POWERS
Rogue is one of Marvel's most iconic and popular mutant characters and she has enjoyed consistent fan acclaim since she burst onto the scene in Avengers Annual #10 in 1981. Her wily personality, distinctive look and awe inspiring powers have enthralled fans for decades... but she's a fairly sympathetic character too.
Rogue's mutation causes her to drain the life force (including the knowledge and superhuman powers) of anyone she touches. This can be extremely painful and potentially fatal for them, and ultimately why the character has historically struggled with physical contact. Still, this hasn't prevented her from being romantically involved with Gambit, Sentry, Spider-Man and even Black Widow.
14 PROFESSOR-X'S MIND READING
Professor Charles Xavier is the founding father of the X-Men and possibly the most prodigious telepath on the planet. But while his powers could potentially make someone virtually omnipotent they'd be an absolute nightmare to live with. Sure, you'd clean up at poker games, but would you really want to spend the rest of your life knowing what everyone really thinks about you?
Finding out that you've been oblivious to your pungent body odor for 25 years, finding out your partner's having an affair or learning that your best friends run a fantasy football league to which you've never been invited are all par for the course when everyone's mind is an open book to you.
13 WOLVERINE'S SENSE OF SMELL
Everyone loves an antihero. Those rough good guys who walk the fine line between darkness and light who ooze charisma and mystique. And if they come with an awesome selection of powers, too... so much the better! But while Wolverine's mutant abilities, martial arts prowess, adamantium skeleton and gruff persona make him a fan-favorite, few would ever want to be him.
Just imagine living with Wolverine's heightened sense of smell, for one thing! For most of us, all it would take is for Magneto not to shower for a week or for Doctor Doom to have enjoyed a big plate of garlic bread and we'd be functionally useless on the battlefield.
12 CHOIR'S MULTIPLE MOUTHS
Some mutant powers are cool, some mutant powers are glamorous. Some are a gift for comic book artists to draw and for readers to see. Others, however, border on Cronenbergian body horror. Such is the case with trainee X-Men choir whose mutation made her develop multiple mouths on her neck.
Not only would this power be of very little use (unless you yearn to be the world's first solo barbershop quartet), it'd be a pretty rough mutation to live with. Never mind the fear and disgust you'd see every day in the eyes of others, just think what you'd spend on toothpaste!
11 SKIN'S EXCESS SKIN POWERS
From The Elongated Man to Mister Fantastic, the world of comics is proliferate with heroes who have stretching powers. But none have a gift quite so unsettling as that of Angelo Espinosa. This less than fortunate X-Man has approximately six feet of extra skin which he can stretch and manipulate.
Doesn't sound too bad, right? But the skin in question is just skin, and without the support of bone and muscle tissue behind it, it's fairly limited in use. Furthermore, his skin is grayish in tone and sags when not in use, making him look like an action figure that's been left on the radiator for too long. He is currently single.
10 MARROW'S CREEPY BONES
It's a dangerous world out there, especially for mutant kind. The ebb and flow of fear, paranoia, hatred and hostility against mutants has permeated the Marvel Universe ever since the concept of mutation was first introduced. In this toxic climate, any mutant would be happy to have a mutation that arms them against potential threats...just not one as gross as Marrow's.
Marrow's mutation causes her to grow bony protrusions which can be detached and used as knives, clubs or projectiles. She mas made a number of attempts to control this repugnant power with mixed success. Suffice to say that blending in will always be an issue for this unfortunate mutant.
9 MAGGOTT'S BIZARRE TECHNO WORMS
Many of the X-Men's powers are fairly standard superhero fare -- flight, strength, speed, agility and the ability to hurl bolts of various different energies. Some, however, err more on the bizarre and borderline repulsive. Such is the case when it comes to this South African mutant.
Maggott's digestive system is not his own. Where most of us keep our intestines, he has a twin pair of semi-sentient robotic slugs (affectionately named Eany and Meay). Once they erupt from his belly, they are able to consume and digest virtually anything at super speeds, converting them into energy that fuels his colossal strength. In the case of sentient beings, they even capture their psychic imprint. Anyone else getting hungry?
8 TATTOO'S BODY ART POWERS
It speaks volumes that Tattoo (who would later re-invent herself as Longstrike) is among Grant Morrison's least bizarre mutant creations. Nonetheless, her mutant ability has to be among the least desirable ever gifted to a mutant. Tattoo (not to be confused with the even lamer Ink-who isn't even a mutant) is able to tattoo any image onto her skin at will... Hardly an Omega level mutation.
While this has some limited use in situations requiring camouflage, mostly she just used it to project messages onto her face. It's telling that Christine Cord would only become cool after re-appropriating Stilt Man's technology. Stilt...Man!
7 BLOB'S BLUBBER
Big is beautiful. But if you're Fred Dukes, it's been extremely useful... Until he was relieved of his powers following the events of "House Of M". Prior to the sweeping Marvel event, however, Blob's blubber was extremely tough and impervious to all manner of physical attacks from gunfire and grenades to Wolverine's claws.
Still, getting through day to day life with a body so surrounded by this blubbery armor would be an absolute nightmare. International travel would be out of the question, as would getting a decent seat at a movie theater. Now that we think of it, we wouldn't much fancy being Colossus either!
6 STACY X'S PHEROMONE POWERS
Initially, Stacy X's mutant powers might actually be quite appealing. Her scaly skin might make you a magnet for dermatologists looking for the book deal that will make them rich, but it would allow you incredible durability and a healing factor to rival Wolverine's. Plus, her pheromone powers would allow you to bend even the strongest of wills to your command.
After a while, though, this power would become a curse. You'd start to question your every personal relationship and get suspicious of anyone who was ever nice to you. You'd wonder if they were acting of their own free will or in the thrall of your powers?
5 CALLISTO'S TENTACLE ARMS
The leader of the underground dwelling Morlocks, Callisto was once beautiful but her mutation forced her underground rather than live amidst humans who found her fearsome and repulsive. Interestingly, Callisto is both a mutant and an Inhuman. Her powers were lost after "House of M" but then regained via the Terrigen mists.
Like her namesake in Greek mythology, Callisto has taken many forms and been re-invented numerous times over the years. By far the most extreme version was when she was "gifted" a set of prehensile tentacles by Masque. While many readers would be happy to inherit Callisto's superhuman sight, hearing, strength and agility, they probably wouldn't appreciate these Cthulhu-esque appendages.
4 WITHER'S DEATH TOUCH
None of us is an island. While some of us may feel a perfectly healthy inclination to enjoy our solitude, human contact is nonetheless essential to our health and well being. Thus, even the most dedicated loner would not wish Kevin Ford's powers upon themselves.
Wither's touch has a devastating effect on all organic material, causing it to decay and eventually disintegrate. He has no control over this power and lives in constant fear that he may inadvertently use it on an innocent person. Even organic fabrics crumble upon contact with his skin, meaning that he can only wear synthetic fibers. A lifetime in polyester?!? No thanks.
3 WOLVERINE'S BONE CLAWS
In the original 2000 X-Men movie, Rogue and Wolverine share a brief but beautifully acted scene in which the younger mutant asks Logan if it hurts him when he bares his claws. "Every time." is his response. Most of us can only imagine what it feels like to have a set of serrated claws spring through the flesh of our hands.
If those claws were laced with indestructible adamantium, it might just be worth the inevitable agony...but let's not forget that Wolverine's claws were originally simple shards of bone. We're not sure that the claws would be anywhere near as useful without the impervious metal upgrade.
2 BEAK'S... BEAK
One of Grant Morrison's most memorable contributions to the Marvel Universe, this Dutch mutant was one of the more tragic students at the Xavier Academy. Despite his horrific appearance, including a beak, talons and a body covered in feathers, Barnell Bohusk had no real powers to speak of aside from slightly enhanced agility on account of his hollow bones.
Don't feel too bad for him, though. After the events of "House of M", Beak shed his ghastly appearance and now fights for justice as Blackwing. In his new incarnation he boasts an armored suit which grants him the power of flight, strength and the ability to shoot energy blasts...now that's more like it!
1 BAILEY'S POWER OF SELF DETONATION
While many mutants are ostracized for their outlandish appearances Bailey Hoskins looks for all the world like an ordinary boy with no mutation whatsoever to speak of. But despite his unassuming appearance, Bailey has a power so devastating that it's completely and utterly useless to him. Bailey is essentially a living bomb.
While he can release the energy within himself at will, detonating his body...well... that's pretty much it. If Bailey ever used his power it would kill him and anyone else who happened to occupy the same ZIP code. It's no wonder that he's widely regarded as the worst X-Man ever.