Disco pilots lost in the future, Hugh Jackman jacked-in for robot combat, and porn-star zombies. Oh, and Godzilla getting the Criterion treatment. Not a bad week on the DVD shelves...
PICK OF THE WEEK: Godzilla: The Criterion Collection (DVD & Blu-ray)
It’s Godzilla, Japan’s most popular non-electronic export. It’s also an impossibly subtle — well, subtle for a movie featuring an aquatic, atomic dinosaur — anti-war film, from the only country to have ever been subject to a nuclear attack. Some of this franchise starter is a little clunky, sure, but there is no denying the enduring appeal of Big G.
Real Steel (DVD & Blu-ray)
Seriously? Honestly? Far better than it looked like it was gonna be. It’s Rocky with robots, not rocket science — despite the fact that you’d need rocket science to make the rock ‘em-sock ‘em bots who battle for humanity’s pleasure in Real Steel’s questionable future.
Buck Rogers in the 25th Century: Season One (DVD)
Spandex uniforms. Horny space princesses. Robot bling. Disco. Col. Wilma Deering. You know you want it.
Paranormal Activity 3 (DVD & Blu-ray)
Scary. Allegedly. I say allegedly, because I’m a wuss and won’t watch it. But as I understand it, PA3 makes up for a shoddy PA2. So, if wetting yourself is your cup of tea, then have at it.
The Toy (Blu-ray)
If you imagine this not as a 1980s relic — it starred Richard Pryor and Jackie Gleason in late-career roles that didn’t befit their comic godfather statuses — and, instead, as an alternate universe where a robot’s programming got wiped and ends up as a toy for a rich kid who bought him fair and square, then it’s still a bit of a mess. But it’s a science-fiction mess.
Porn Star Zombies (DVD)
You’re gonna watch this movie based on the title, or not. There’s nothing I can say that’ll change your minds.
Tales of an Ancient Empire (DVD)
Kevin Sorbo. That’s all you need to know. (Okay, it’s also apparently horrible ... which means that it’s just begging to be viewed with a pepperoni pizza and a six-pack.)
The House on Sorority Row (DVD)
If you’re going to watch one cult-classic horror movie with a gaggle of nubile young college students getting hacked to pieces ...