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Chews And Justice: The 15 Weirdest Things Superman Has Ever Eaten

There is no debating that Superman is the most powerful superhero in the world. He is super strong, super fast, has heat vision and super breath, he can leap tall buildings in a single bound (when he’s not actually flying over them), and... look, you get the idea. While many Superman stories hint that his ability to gather energy from the sun makes eating unnecessary, we have still seen the Man of Steel eat more than his fair share of food wherever he goes.

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He can do pretty much anything he wants with his powers, and if a super-man has invulnerable skin and super strength, it follows that every bit of him has those abilities too. This means super strong teeth, and the ability to eat just about anything he wants. After all, we know that his favorite dish is beef bourguignon with ketchup, a meal that has become a running joke in Superman comics over the years. The Kryptonian has said that he mostly eats food out of habit, but on a few occasions he’s also eaten things that the normal people of Earth would not consider to be food. What follows is an attempt to document the 15 weirdest things Superman has ever eaten.

15 A TIME BOMB

Superman and Lois Lane have had many fateful first encounters, but maybe none more awkward than the time the Man of Steel ate a bomb on Lois & Clark: The New Adventures of Superman. While watching a shuttle launch on television, Clark Kent realizes that something is wrong. He flies to Metropolis in order to save the day, and he finds Lois Lane trying to deactivate a bomb.

When you have a super strong outside, it’s important to have a durable inside as well. For anyone who is wondering, Superman has a super stomach. He shows up, pops the bomb into his mouth, allows the bomb to explode inside of him, and burps. Just like in The Mask,  but without saying that's a spicy meatball!

14 ONE MILLION HAMBURGERS

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Everyone knows that Superman gets his amazing superpowers from the radiation emitted by our sun. When something happens to the sun, it’s only a matter of time before something happens to Superman. In Action Comics #454, Superman becomes incredibly tired from using his abilities. It gets so bad that he has to take in thousands of calories at once just to regain his strength.

He visits a diner and has them cook up every hamburger in the place. Then he heads home with the contents of an entire bodega in his apartment. It turns out that a radioactive rock at the center of the Earth is somehow draining the sun of its energy and causing Superman to lose more energy than he can retain. When the problem is fixed, he goes back to normal.

13 KRYPTONIAN CHOCOLATE

If Superman has super teeth, then he never has to go to the dentist. That is, unless he eats chocolate artificially infused with Kryptonian science. In Action Comics #434, Clark Kent receives a mysterious box of chocolates from his new fan club; however, as soon as he bites into one, he suffers a massive toothache that requires him to see a dentist immediately.

At the doctor’s office, the dentist manages to sedate Clark, despite the fact that he’s Superman. It turns out that it’s secretly Xa-Du, the man who would eventually be known as The Phantom King. The evil Kryptonian scientist shows Superman a hallucinogenic trip, and then just leaves him in the dentist chair for the real doctor to find him. Now that’s a master plan.

12 DOG BISCUITS

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When Superman commits to a plan, he really commits, no matter what. When he was active as Superboy, he did some weird things with his dog Krypto, like in Adventure Comics #310, when he pretends he’s a dog for the whole issue. A mysterious device makes Clark and Krypto swap minds, so while Superboy is acting like a dog, his pooch is walking around on his hind legs and talking.

Superboy lives in a doghouse, goes for walks, and follows scents on all four legs, while his companion eats at the table and holds the leash. At one point, Superman eats a bowl of dog biscuits, but when we later find out that the two of them were faking the whole time, the whole ordeal feels a little awkward. Also, how was Krypto able to talk?

11 HUMAN FLESH (OVERMAN)

Today, we know Overman to be the Nazi version of Superman, but back in 1991, Grant Morrison created a different evil version of the Man of Steel. In Animal Man #23, the Psycho-Pirate brought back several worlds that no longer existed after the destruction of the multiverse. It was a low-key sequel to Crisis on Infinite Earths.

One such world included Overman, a superhero created by the government who was used to spawn the rest of his world’s crime fighting community. Psycho-Pirate’s vision shows the fate of the world, where this version of Superman contracted an STD, went crazy and killed all the other superheroes. It’s also heavily implied that he ate their bodies after he was done. He then escaped into the real world in order to continue his rampage.

10 NUCLEAR EXPLOSION

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Don’t ever let anyone say that Superman isn’t a supporter of the sciences. In Superboy #115, during his career as Superboy, Clark Kent helped two scientists conduct an experiment. They knew two chemicals mixed together would produce a nuclear explosion, but with no safe place to test their theory, they asked Superboy and his super stomach to help out.

Clark drank the two chemicals, which mixed inside his stomach, and produced a massive nuclear reaction. For the rest of the story, Superboy now has the ability to spew nuclear fire from his mouth. He uses it to help do some good before saving the life of an alien and passing on the energy to him. As if Superman wasn’t strong enough, apparently he also needed fire breath.

9 FIREPLACE POKER

Even in the early days, Superman was biting off anything he could chew. In Action Comics #27 back in 1940, his powers were still nowhere near what they would one day become. People still thought they could take Superman on in a hand-to-hand fight. On this occasion, a crook thought he could attack Superman with a red-hot metal poker and have it actually do damage.

Not only did the Man of Steel shrug off this attack, but he actually took a bite out of the weapon as well. He finds it a "tasty little snack" and actually mentions that he likes his food even hotter than that. It’s likely that the metal poker he just bit into was somewhere over 1,000 degrees Fahrenheit, so this proves Superman is insane.

8 WOODEN APPLE

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Superman thinks he’s so clever, being able to change in and out of his secret identity at super speed, any time he wants. What happens when someone catches him in the act, though? That’s what happens in Superman #100. Someone catches Superman changing into Clark Kent’s clothes, and it forces him to create a mustache for himself.

In his new disguise, he looks exactly like a teacher named Mr. Cranston and ends up roped into teaching a class at a nearby school. The school kids, trying to play a trick on a normal, not-super teacher give him an apple made out of wood. Given his abilities, Superman can tell the difference, but he decides to eat it anyway just to mess with the kids. It was quite the riot.

7 EVERYTHING GREEN

In a story typical of the Silver Age of comics, Superboy and Krypto are attacked by a space dragon that makes him compelled to eat anything colored green and his dog compelled to eat anything red. It sounds dumb — and it is — until you realize how many mundane things are either green or red in the world. The two cause trouble through Smallville until they are cured.

During his eating rampage in Superboy #91, Clark ends up eating a green license plate, green fence, green carpet, green canvas and green paint. He also stopped a bank robbery and ate all the money they were stealing. The two are only cured when Superboy and Krypto appease their appetites by each devouring green and red moons. This was quite the case of the munchies.

6 POCKET KNIFE

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People like to think that Superman is lame, but if they just read some of his first adventures they would know how truly hardcore he can really be. In Superman #8, he did plenty to make himself look less like a Big Blue Boy Scout, and more like a madman capable of wanton destruction wherever he goes. Each of the stories in this issue shows him messing up someone else’s day, and it’s incredible.

In one instance, he steals the gun from a crook, shoots it at him, and stops the bullet before it can hit him. He also meets with a bunch of German soldiers and destroys their entire camp with his bare hands. Lastly, he fights a group of gangsters, and when one of them pulls a pocket knife on him, Superman just eats the whole thing.

5 AN ENTIRE ROYAL BANQUET

Superman is the worst date ever. When Princess Jena of Adoria visits Earth in Action Comics #266, she takes a liking to Superman. They travel back to her world, and in order to get him to love her, she has a love potion made up to win him over. After he drinks it, he shows very little control over his powers. Superman smashes through walls, breaks things and causes disturbances wherever he goes.

Superman also eats an entire royal banquet all on his own. He devours everything just as everyone is ready to eat — INCLUDING THE BONES! He also drinks all their water, which they apparently don’t have a lot of on Adoria. In the end, Jena rejects him as a menace, but then we find out that the potion didn’t do anything and Superman was just being a jerk on purpose.

4 URANIUM (SUPERBOY PRIME)

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He might not be Superman proper, but Superboy Prime is simply a younger version of Clark Kent from a different world. After he turns evil in Infinite Crisis, he joins up with Sinestro during the "Sinestro Corps War." Using the power of Fear, he engages in an epic battle with Sodam Yat, current host for the Ion avatar of Willpower.

The two travel many miles over the course of their battle. At one point, the two smash through a nuclear power plant. In an attempt to kill his opponent, Yat shoves a uranium rod down Superboy Prime’s mouth. It seems like an effective attack, only this boy has the powers of Superboy, and he can bite through anything. He merely sits there and chomps on the uranium, taunting the hero.

3 DEADLY MICROBES

Are you tired of getting calls from people trying to sell you things? It would seem that Superman was so sick of being sold insurance in 1951 that he went out of his way to prove just how invulnerable he was. In World's Finest Comics #54, Superman took a shot from a cannon, sat in a furnace, froze himself, and even went on to drink a big cup of the world’s deadliest microbes.

Other than the fact that this last bit was utterly disgusting, Superman finally convinced the salesman that he did not need insurance. However, he is later convinced to sign a contract that will pay millions of dollars to the poor if he should die, but he is forced to follow all the maddening rules of his new policy and is unable to do anything dangerous.

2 A SALT SHAKER

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Things got extremely weird in Superman’s Girl Friend, Lois Lane #1 when the Man of Steel goes a little too far in order to conceal his secret identity. Lois Lane becomes a cook at a diner in Metropolis in order to get Superman to fall in love with her, because this is how women attract men in 1974. The joke is that Superman keeps secretly ruining everything she makes him because he’s too busy saving the day.

At some point, Clark Kent eats at the diner, but he soon makes a return as Superman in order to cover up the fact that his fingerprints were left on the salt shaker. See, apparently he thinks Lois will compare them to Superman’s and find out the truth. Instead of simply wiping the fingerprints off, he feels that would be too conspicuous, so he decides to just eat the whole thing.

1 KRYPTONITE

Traditionally, Kryptonite has been seen as one of Superman’s few weaknesses, but in Superman #233, he takes a bite out of a hunk of glowing green rock. In the 1970s, DC Comics felt it was too ridiculous to have its most powerful superhero done in by such a small thing, so the company decided to do away with Kryptonite altogether by turning every sample of it on Earth into harmless iron.

A small-time crook, apparently not getting the memo, attempted to use Kryptonite against the Man of Steel, and boy did Superman make him look stupid. He snatched up the rock, took a nice, healthy bite, and found that it was a nice little snack. It just needs a bit of salt is all.

Do you remember any another weird things Superman has eaten? Serve up your knowledge in the comments.

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