I have comic book weapons on the brain these days. I’ve been working on a few comic pitches and weapons are involved (because of course they are). And it got me thinking about all the great weapons I love in comics.

Comic have heavily influenced both of my novels – and for the second novel - Storykiller - I decided I needed to create a weapon worthy of my lead, her mission, and the massive world I was creating. So it was with a lot of my favorite comic book weapons in mind that I created La Colombe Noire (The Black Dove) a magical double sided axe that could only be called forth (and wielded) by its owner and its ownership could only be transferred by killing the previous owner with it. The Black Dove turned out to be one of my favorite things in Storykiller, though it certainly helped to have artists like Sophie Campbell and Stephanie Hans bringing it to beautiful life:



So I though it might make for a fun column to talk about some of my favorite comic book weapons. What’s on this list…well, there’s a mountain of great weapons in the comic-verse, but since this column is about women in comics I decided to stick to weapons that have been wielded by women at some point or another (sometimes exclusively, sometimes not). And then here’s the usual disclaimer: these are not necessarily the “most powerful” or “best” weapons but just my favorites -- both those I enjoy reading about and those that I would most definitely like to get my hands on as a creator!

In no particular order:



BATARANGS

Owner/Wielder: Technically, Batman, but for our purposes Cass Cain/Batgirl/Black Bat

Why they're awesome: The quintessential Bat weapon is almost as famous as Batman himself. And it’s kind of amazing that they’re so beloved because they’re based (at least loosely) on boomerangs. And while I intend no offense against boomerangs, they’re not particularly scary as weapons go. So the fact that they have such kind of “humble” origins and are one of the most known (and feared) weapons in the comic universe is pretty incredible. If you’re a criminal what’s scarier than seeing a Batarang fly by? Almost nothing. Batarangs are often used more like throwing stars or shuriken these days than boomarangs, but that’s pretty cool too so should hardly count against the weapon. Also pretty fantastic is that in the same way that the same way Batman has spawned related characters (Batgirl, Batwoman, etc.) batarangs have spawned their own related versions: Wing-Dings, Birdarangs, and the poorly named R-shaped Shuriken are all “things” we fans know well. Robin needs a new PR guy I guess!

Fatal Flaw: Being too badass? Is that a flaw?



SATAN CLAW

Most recent wielder: Sharon Carter/Agent 13

Why it’s awesome: In addition to having one of the best names around (Satan Claw, are you kidding me?!?!) it’s one of those weapons that (probably in part thanks to having an awesome and terrifying name) has a long history and despite trying to be destroyed many times never manages to go away. The Satan Claw is also notable as being the actual prosthetic arm for Baron Wolfgang Von Strucker for some time after losing it to Nick Fury, but it’s also been just an object/weapon that someone can put on over their hand to give them both crazy increased strength and the power to deliver electrical shocks. The Satan Claw is apparently in the hands of SHIELD right now. The first time I saw the Satan Claw was actually pretty recently when Sharon Carter wielded it in Warren Ellis and David Aja’s Secret Avengers #18. I’ve been obsessed with seeing more of it ever since. Interesting tidbit – from what I can tell an alternate reality version of the Satan Claw absorbs the youth/energy of its victims making the wearer younger/stronger. Soooo cool.

Fatal Flaw: That it’s not on Sharon Carter’s hand at all times?





SOULSWORD

Owner/Wielder: Illyana Rasputin/Magik

Why it’s awesome: Literally a sword made out of Ilyana’s soul. We could probably just stop there. That trumps almost anything. Oh wait, there’s even more cool crap. Not only is it made of her soul, but she made (and named it) herself and used it to escape from Limbo. Though others have wielded the sword (most notably Kitty Pryde) only Illyana has full mastery over the sword, which makes sense since it’s made of her freaking soul. Easily one of he most powerful weapons in the Marvel Universe its full power has likely not even been revealed but what has been revealed is no less than: possession determines leadership of Limbo, disrupts magic and breaks spells, teleportation, spell casting, heightened/super strength, augmented/increased magical power, ability to summon the mystical Eldrich Armor, manipulating dimensions, magical summoning (and storing), and absorption of souls. So, yeah. Big. Strong. Badass. Sword. The sword has changed over time, possibly (likely) related to Illyana herself changing. And in Chris Bachalo’s hands over the last few years it has become a truly magnificent and distinguishing weapon. Oh yeah, and it gains in strength and ability with each use. O_O

Fatal Flaw: Weapons that have that much power are obviously dangerous in the wrong hands (and those “wrong hands” have sometimes even been Illyana’s). Also, swords made out of people’s souls…seems like just asking for trouble, doesn’t it?



MEGA-ROD

Owner/Wielder: Big Barda

Why it’s awesome: When you’ve got a character as powerful, badass, and subtle (ha) as Big Barda you need a weapon to match, and bonus points when it’s got a name as unsubtle as MEGA-ROD. So great. The Mega-Rod can project high-level energy blasts (enough to blast through the hull of a ship!), it can be used for the best kind of transportation – teleportation! – and of course you can hit people with it. What good is a weapon you can’t bludgeon people with amirite? And even though I LOVE The Mother Box (motherboooooxxxxx!) The Mega-Rod is one up on it because though it’s powerful its less likely to be used as a Deus Ex Machina problem solver for all occasions, which kinda happens a lot with The Mother Box.

Fatal Flaw: Apparently an alias for the Mega-Rod is the Power Wand. And I can only ask WHY? You are called The Mega-Rod there is no better name!





BOW & ARROW

Owner/Wielder: Kate Bishop/Hawkeye

Why they're awesome: A bow & arrow has been pretty awesome for a very long time, I mean, original bad boy Robin Hood was all about it, right? And if there was any doubt Katniss Everdeen more recently made it effortlessly cool on big screens everywhere. But Clint and Kate have been rocking the simple bow & arrow for a long time now. Matt Fraction and David Aja’s Hawkeye #3 was the perfect issue to illustrate why the bow & arrow is so great as a comics weapon. As Kate mercilessly makes fun of Clint’s “trick arrows” (and the reader feels tempted to agree) in the end both Kate and the reader must come around (beautifully and hilariously) to respect even trick arrows and to understand that everything has its place and value. The issue really puts a fine point (no pun!) on how powerful an expert marksmen, and a quiver full of arrows, trick or otherwise, can be – and how much fun. While most of the other weapons on this list have great powerful names – and there IS power in those names – there’s something to be said for the idea that the “special-ness” of Kate and Clint lies in themselves and any old bow and arrow will do. Turning a weakness into a strength is what Hawkeyes are all about donchaknow!?

Fatal Flaw: Can be hard to carry around and has limited ammo, though through the miracle of comics we rarely see that as an issue.





MJOLNIR

Owner/Wielder: Thor

Why it’s awesome: Well, why ISN’T it awesome? Though Thor has always appealed to me (I love Mythology of all kinds) I’ve never been a big Thor reader mostly because I have to make tough choices about what to read for money and time. I’ve started to read the most recent run because it obviously appeals to my interests – i.e. women in comics – and have really been enjoying it so far. But between my affection for Norse mythology generally and my enjoyment of the Thor films (Hemsworth4eva!) I’ve dug Mjolnir for a long time. It has the power to “destroy mountains” (no joke) and just about anything else (so long as it’s not adamantium and vibramium). It can also create force fields, emit blasts of energy, anti-force, thermo-blast, god-blast, and create wind and antimatter particles. It’s also got some cool rarely used stuff like the ability to cause vampires to burst into flames and crumble to dust (watch out Jubilee). Also it’s a hammer so it can just pound the crap out of stuff...that's what hammers do. Oh. And it can travel THROUGH PLANETS to return to Thor. Badass. Then again its name means “The Crusher” or “The Grinder” which is damn brutal for a weapon wielded by a god…and a weapon that demands you be worthy before you pick it up. Worthy of the wielding The Grinder? Yikes!

Fatal Flaw: Not sure it’s a flaw, but it can really break your heart if it finds you no longer worthy and refuses to budge. Then again, that little trick is the best possible insurance that a literal god weapon won’t fall into the wrong hands, something that none of the other weapons on this list manage.



HEARTBREAKER

Owner/Wielder: Alana

Why it’s awesome: One of the best names for a weapon ever, even on this list full of great names. This weapon is pretty unique on the list in that there’s nothing specific to Alana about this weapon – i.e. this is not Alana’s “signature weapon” or anything, it’s just a weapon she stole and has used a few times, but it’s too cool not to include. A weapon that provides both physical and emotional devastation?! Amazing. That is particularly brutal and thus super cool...assuming you want things to be brutal and we do, because we're talking about weapons here. Alana has used it on Marko, Klara, and Gwendolyn, and even threatened to use it on her daughter Hazel, though her bluff was called on that one. It’s interesting that everyone Alana has used it on thus far (to my knowledge) is someone emotionally connected to her in some way – her husband, her step-mother, her husband’s ex – rather than just being random people. I wonder if that’s just a coincidence? It’s pretty interesting either way.

Fatal Flaw: Doesn’t work on robots!



LASSO OF TRUTH

Owner/Wielder: Wonder Woman

Why it’s awesome: Unbreakable, immutable, and infinitely elastic, the Lasso is highly flexible in what it can do and what it can be about. It can restore lost memories, eliminate illusions, hypnotize, protect from magical attacks, force people to tell the truth, and of course be used to tie people up – it IS a rope after all. Wonder Woman obviously uses the lasso for good, but the truth is that the lasso’s purpose is to allow the wielder to compel those bound by it, which means it is crazy dangerous if it falls into hands that are less than someone like Diana. The Lasso of Truth is one of those great objects that has real myth and mystique to it and it somehow manages to straddle both being this badass weapon often used for violence and also this powerful beacon of justice. Few weapons can handle both those extremes with the same grace as the Lasso of Truth. Also, let’s be real, great weapons need great names, and THE LASSO OF TRUTH is a GREAT name.

Fatal Flaw: In the wrong hands it is a massively dangerous weapon and it can be highly dangerous even for non-villains to use. Artemis, inexperienced with the lasso, once inadvertently drove a man to suicide.





E.V.A.

Owner/Wielder: Jean-Phillipe/Fantomex

Why it’s awesome: So this is not technically wielded by a woman, but it has a “female persona/sentience” and there are actually several versions of Fantomex (because he has three different brains) and at least one of those brains (and forms in Uncanny X-Force Vol. 2, not my favorite development/execution to be honest) is a woman, so we’ll say E.V.A. is eligible as a weapon, she certainly deserves to be. E.V.A., which generally presents (or used to) as Fantomex’s sentient ship possesses a symbiotic and telepathic relationship to Fantoxmex, and is actually his primary external nervous system. E.V.A. is biomechanical and is both ship and weapon. She’s incredible in that she can both be controlled telepathically by Fantomex as his ship and weapon, but also has the ability to control herself as well when he hands off the control. She can shift her shape into several different forms, control/fly herself, and shoot energy weapons. Having E.V.A. is kind of like getting to be both human and computer (which technically I guess Fantomex is anyway?) but E.V.A. puts a much finer point on it and she looks like an alien.

Fatal Flaw: Though there have been examples of Fantomex not feeling pain or at least being able to better withstand it thanks to E.V.A. being his nervous system, if E.V.A. is injured separate from Fantomex he can feel her pain, which could be a liability.



BLACK WIDOW’S GAUNTLETS

Owner/Wielder: Natasha Romanova/Black Widow

Why they are awesome: Black Widow’s gauntlets are basically a fashionable Bat utility belt. The history on the gauntlets is essentially that a version of them (as bracelets) were designed by the Soviets and they have been upgraded and modified by SHIELD. But my own personal canon is that Natasha long ago started making upgrades and modifications herself. She’s more than clever enough to handle it and she knows best what she needs. The gauntlets include or have included the following: a grappling line/hooks, “widow’s bite,” “widow’s kiss”/knock out gas, explosives, tear gas, radio transmitter/tracking. The gauntlets often feel like an extension of Natasha, they’re as clever and as resourceful as she needs them to be because those are the things Natasha naturally is. One of the best things about Natasha is her ability to not only survive, but to thrive, in a world where most of her closest allies and enemies have far more base power than she does. Writing about Natasha and her gauntlets makes it more clear than ever that Black Widow is basically Marvel’s Batman…annnnd now I also want to write her more than ever.

Fatal Flaw: I don’t own a pair.

What about you? What are some of your favorite weapons? If I hadn’t been making a list of weapons with women wielders I might have included Fables’ Witching Cloak, The Batmobile, Steve Roger’s Captain America Shield, Star Lord’s Helmet, Hellboy’s “Right Hand of Doom,” and if I’d had room Valkyrie’s Dragonfang Sword (made from an extra-dimensional dragon fang. DRAGONS). What about you?


Kelly Thompson is a freelance writer living in Manhattan. She is the author of the superhero novel THE GIRL WHO WOULD BE KING recently optioned to become a film, and her new novel STORYKILLER is out now. She wrote the graphic novel HEART IN A BOX and is writing IDW’s JEM AND THE HOLOGRAMS, and co-writing CAPTAIN MARVEL & THE CAROL CORPS. You can find Kelly all over the place, but twitter may be the easiest: @79semifinalist