In which Bill pitches his new X-Book

Bill: Or maybe I'd launch a new series called Brand X that stars only the really freaky mutants.

Like a rebeaked Beak!

And some poor schmuck who's made entirely of arms and eyes.

Ian A: ha ha ha

Bill: Frank Quitely will draw the covers, and only the covers, and the entire book will just be covers of Quitely drawing freakier and freakier shit until we get cancelled four issues in because the retailers ordered the first three months sight unseen and oh shit hey there's no pages in here man, we just paid half the cover for some staples

Ian A: hahahahahah

"Five dollars for a cover?!"

"It's oversized."

"Oh."

Bill: "Cardstock, bitches!"

"Why, sir, I say! Such balderdash. Terrible. I won't stand for it. Do you have the variant cover?"

Sixteen variants, every issue, all of them part of one huge sixteentych that lines up with eight hundred freaky mutants all tangled together and writhing around like some horrendous orgy, different colored limbs poking out, daring the reader to open to its nonexistent insides.