Hey, it's another contest!
Why a contest? Because I wanted to do something fun.
See, I've been feeling a bit grumpy about the comics industry for the last couple of weeks. What with the court judgement against Gary Friedrich, and the flap over Before Watchmen (and the fact that in both cases there was an inexplicable amount of nerdrage directed at the creators rather than the corporations that screwed them)... and then all the deeply insane responses to our own Kelly Thompson pointing out things so blatantly obvious they shouldn't even need pointing out... and then there was this I-give-up article where I found almost nothing to disagree with... then there's the whole Comic Book Men squabble about "making us look bad" where the elephant in the room is that a lot of us really are that bad...it had reached the point where I thought this week's column would be an angry screed along the lines of, "What the hell is WRONG with so many of you?" It would have been an easy column to write and God knows, after over a decade moderating over at the CBR forums, I've got a bunch of fandom horror stories of my own to add to all the ones in the press the last couple of weeks.
Here's the problem, though. Sure, columns like that are controversial and they get a lot of traffic, but I don't particularly enjoy writing them. And they're a waste of time. After all, it's not as though the fans that need to grow up ever actually do it just because someone tells them that they need to. Show of hands-- how many of you out there reading this have wasted more than an hour of your life trying to correct someone's thinking on the internet? More than three hours? How many have wasted a day? And here's the key question-- did it work? Did you actually get the other guy to concede the point?
Yeah, that's what I figured. The prosecution rests.
So I thought, "Instead of bitching for 2500 words and accomplishing nothing, I should lighten up. A column about something amusing, trivial and fun--" and the word trivial did it. A trivia contest. I haven't done one of these in a while and they're always a good time.
This time out, I decided that the theme would be non-powered, street-level heroics. The hard-boiled detectives, vigilantes, and pulp avengers that have kept the urban jungle safe for the rest of us, from the Golden Age to the present day.
Don't put your answers in the Comments section! If you do that, I will delete them and make cruel fun of you. Email them to me at ghatcher79 (at) gmail.com.
In the case of a tie, the winner will be the email with the earliest timestamp. Decisions made by me are final.
Deadline for entries is Thursday March 1st, midnight, Pacific Standard Time.
As always, Google is frowned upon. Anybody can enter a phrase into a search engine. Feel free to look things up but do it by actually reading your real comics.
Also, don't put your answers in the Comments section. Seriously.
And what are they playing for, Johnny?
The second season of Columbo.
[caption id="attachment_102814" align="alignnone" width="620" caption="Featuring A STITCH IN TIME, with Evil Surgeon Spock trying to kill Grandpa Walton. Good times. "]
Yes, the entire season on region 1 DVD. (I know, it's not comics-related at all, but it's a cool set. Somehow we ended up with two of them, and this is a lot more fun than just giving it away to a friend at work or something.) Anyway, this is all eight of the Season 2 TV-movies, brand-new, still in the shrinkwrap. Shipped free to wherever you are.
Okay? Everybody ready? Here we go.
1. How did Misty Knight lose her arm? And who replaced it with a bionic one?
2. Who teamed up with hard-hitting private eye Slam Bradley in his first POST-Golden Age appearance in DC Comics, in the early 1980s?
3. What's the name of the show hosted by TV detective Roy Raymond?
4. Name Ms. Tree's colleagues at the Tree Detective Agency.
5. How did Shang-Chi, master of kung fu, first meet Black Jack Tarr?
6. The Shadow teamed up with Batman, twice. Who was the villain of the piece the first time? And the second?
7. What was the name of the cop in the bowler hat that often worked with the original White Tiger?
8. Which of the original Avenger pulps were adapted for comics?
9. According to Denny O'Neil, how did Vic Sage meet Aristotle Rodor?
10. Why were so many Modesty Blaise fans angry about the final story in the book collection Cobra Trap?
11. Who was the comely redheaded girl that befriended Val Armorr in 20th-century New York, back when he was starring in his short-lived 1970s solo title?
12. What's Jigsaw's real name, and who teamed up with Frank Castle to beat him in his first appearance?
13. Why did patrolman Jim Harper originally decide just being a policeman wasn't enough, so he would have to become the Guardian?
14. Mark Valley wasn't the first actor to portray Chistopher Chance, the Human Target. Who was?
15. What's the name of the adulterous husband whose angry wife hires Nathaniel Dusk to get divorce evidence on, in the first issue of his miniseries?
There you go. That should keep you busy for a while. Remember, using Google is for sissies!
Back next week with the answers and a winner.