Regardless of how one may feel about the most recent live-action film, The Justice League has captivated the nation. Everything JL related, from figurines to games, are flying off the shelves faster than Barry Allen. Originally introduced in 1960 in The Brave and The Bold #28, long time fans know that the combinations of heroes presented in this franchise of the DCU are always going to bring you along for a fun ride. These superheroes assembled together for the good of all, to save the world and fight evil. Of course, the League includes of our favorite heroes, which is maybe why we love Justice League so much. Who wouldn’t want to see Batman, Wonder Woman, The Flash, Superman, Cyborg, Green Arrow, and more clean up for some good, clean, family fun and entertainment, right?
Of course, there are darker sides to these story lines that can be missed, especially by those who don’t have the interest in animation. The JL movies are some of our favorites here at CBR, even though they can have some pretty ridiculous and extreme moments. From bondage to nudity to monsters made from “waste,” here are some of the most inappropriate scenes from the Justice League animated movies that we’ve stumbled upon. Warning, there are minor spoilers ahead!
15. LEX LUTHOR GREETS THE JL “IN THE BUFF”
In Crisis on Two Earths, an alternate Lex Luthor contacts the Justice League by turning himself in to the police. While awaiting their arrival, he decides to strip down to his birthday suit to “show that he isn’t armed.” When The Flash, Superman, and Wonder Woman walk into the holding cell, only to find a nude Lex Luthor casually reading a newspaper, they’re shocked.
Of course, anyone would be! That’s kind of the last thing one would expect when preparing to go interrogate Luthor. Superpowers, check. Lasso of Truth, check. Um, hand sanitizer? Alternative world Lex proceeds to explain his reasoning behind this lewd introduction, but it’s still pretty freakin’ awkward. This scene is summed up best by Barry’s response — “Whoa, and they call me ‘The Flash’!” — and has us giggling like Star Wars fans holding tickets for the Last Jedi.
14. AURORA’S OUTFIT FROM “TWO EARTHS”
A character who has had many incarnations throughout her existence in DC, Aurora has powers and abilities not to be taken lightly, including flight and energy manipulation. This is all well and good, except for the way they designed her outfit in Justice League: Crises on Two Earths. “Two Earths Aurora” wears a dark blue bodysuit with cute ’70s style red, yellow, and light blue stripes on the legs and arms.
Fun, right? Well, it would be, if they hadn’t included what appear to be, um, pasties or something on her breasts and crotch, that are bright white and draw complete attention to those areas! We can just hear her saying to Green Lantern “Eyes up here!” We’re trying, but the sizing, placement, and highly contrasting color all make those white “pads” the equivalent of neon signs!
13. THEY MADE HARLEY QUINN INTO A MONKEY
Harley Quinn is a complex character, which has been and is being written about and analyzed by us all. One thing that is certain is she seems to be incapable of functioning without her Puddin’, at least until recently. In the alternate universes of Two Earths, Harley Quinn’s relationship with Joker, or in this world, the “Jester,” is summed up quite nicely albeit a bit darkly in her portrayal as a monkey dressed in motley attire, complete with a classic style jester cap and tutu.
Lex Luthor greets her by name as “Monkey Harley” and she prances over to him in Jester’s lair, otherwise it would be near impossible to catch the implication of the who cute little primate is in this cameo. Get it, she’s co-dependent, therefore Mistah J’s “monkey” to be manipulated! The concept is both very funny and sad at the same time.
12. EVERYTHING ABOUT SUPERWOMAN
Another character with a convoluted history since her appearance back in Superman #47, Superwoman is generally a baddie who stirs up trouble for The Man of Steel himself. Her portrayal in Crises on Two Earths is no exception to this rule of thumb. In this version, she is basically an evil Wonder Woman — an Amazonian from an alternate island of Amazonians, who is so awesome and horrible that she killed off all her fellow Amazons from her dimension.
Dressed from head to toe in black, and dropping innuendos like Batman drops criminals, Superwoman is definitely not a character meant for younger audiences. She is a lot of fun — we’re not going to lie and say that we at CBR don’t enjoy our wild romps with her — just don’t trust Superwoman, especially when it comes to things like the potential obliteration of the universe!
11. 50 SHADES OF DC
In every single Justice League animated movie, there is at least one bondage scene. Whether it’s Wonder Woman attempting to “compel” someone with her Golden Lasso, Green Lantern using his ring to chain up a foe, or Batman getting tied up by some villain and then somehow escaping — Giovanni Zatara style — the bondage inspired scenes scattered throughout these films are numerous.
This shouldn’t be too surprising, considering there is a lot of implied kink and bondage scattered throughout the DCU, especially when one takes the time to read the comics. There is also the fact that that gentleman who created Wonder Woman, William Moulton Marston, was also documented as being a “student” of bondage and submission with women. We’re feeling like we might need a safe word here. To quote Wade Wilson, um, we mean, Slade Wilson… we’re thinking “Pork’n’Beans.”
10. CHILD’S PLAY
Picture this scenario: there is this little kid, who fights crime alongside a bunch of adults. We’re not talking about Robin, but Billy Batson, also known as Shazam. For some reason, a Wizard chose this young boy to harness an energy dubbed the “Living Lightning” — an energy that endows its carrier with god-like powers and magical abilities. Seems like a great idea to give those kinds of powers and responsibilities to a kid, Mr. Wizard Guy.
Nobody seems to stop and consider that Billy is a little boy, because when he is transformed into Shazam, he is in the form of a grown man. Size doesn’t always matter though, and in this case, if you stop to consider while he goes about his superhero business that he is in fact a boy, the concept of Shazam gets pretty weird, pretty fast.
9. DEAD MOM TNA
Everyone knows that killing is wrong, especially killing your mom… well, unless you’re a psychopath or something along those lines. In Throne of Atlantis, Aquaman’s half-brother, Orm, displays his madness by killing their mom right before Aquaman has the chance to meet her and causing total mayhem in the Atlantean world.
If that weren’t rough enough, we’re also given a brief morose peep show as the former Queen of Atlanta is laid to rest. Still wearing her fine, royal garb — which is classic comics scanty attire, even if it is pretty — the deceased Queen’s robes float about her like seaweed in the currents. It’s a seemingly sincere and somber scene, but the clothes move a bit too much, revealing high upper thigh and other glimpses of body parts before transitioning to the next scene.
8. VAMPIRE BATS
Quite possibly one of CBR’s least favorite interpretations of B-man, Justice League: Gods and Monsters is a parallel world to our own, changed by one difference in a major historical event. This single change created a “butterfly affect” on the reality we know, including a Dark Knight alternate who is battling Lymphoma. Out of desperation, this eventual Batman tries a risky, novel scientific experiment from someone he thinks he can trust involving a serum derived from bat DNA.
In the process, he is transformed into a creature who can only sustain life by drinking the blood of other humans, while fighting crime and injustice. That’s right, folks, Vampire Batman — basically the Dexter meets Twilight equivalent of our favorite man to wear the cowl. It’s okay because he only drinks the blood of bad guys, though, right?
7. PLATINUM’S TRANSFORMED LOOK
Reminiscent of the scary metal dude in Terminator 2, Tina was just your average girl until she was killed when her boyfriend struck her out of rage and her head slammed into a coffee table. Out of guilt and fear of being caught, said slap-happy boyfriend created her robot equivalent, Platinum, to take Tina’s place. As if this character’s origins aren’t twisted enough, her transformed look cranks things up to eleven.
When Platinum loses her human form and dons her liquid all-metal appearance, she is basically naked! Her nipples can be clearly seen, along with other body lines, leaving little to the imagination. Not that we are anti the female form, quite the opposite! It just doesn’t seem appropriate if it’s supposed to be for children. Animation is always only just for for kids, everyone knows that. (NOTE: We’ve had to doctor the above image to make it more palatable for all readers… which is kind of ironic?)
6. KNOW YOUR TRUTH
In Justice League War, a public distrustful of superheroes are protests Wonder Woman’s arrival to the White House. A confused Diana steps out of the limo escorting her onto the grounds, amidst the group. “You gather to protest…me?” She points to one man in particular, asking him what his problem with her is.
The random guy starts yelling at Wonder Woman about “wanting the truth” and telling her all kinds of mean things, including that she “dresses like a whore.” Diana entraps the man with her Golden Lasso, saying, “This is not your truth!” and demanding he share what his “truth” is. “I cross-dress in a Wonder Woman outfit,” he says. “It makes me feel powerful.” She laughs, releasing the man of the lasso’s grip — “Embrace your truth, my friend. My outfit makes me feel powerful, too.”
5. THE LAST STORY
The intro to New Frontier is one of the most violent scenes in any of the JLA films. We are brought into the world of a graphic artist who is telling the story of creation and evolution, specifically that of mankind and our destructive powers. The pretty colors contrast starkly with the disembodied, ominous voice and tale we’re hearing as it plays across the screen.
“Now they have harnessed the most destructive force and I — THE CENTRE — have concluded the sphere must be cleansed of them.” With that final panel completed in what is called “The Last Story,” we see a first person perspective of the artist closing the book, picking up a pistol, and bringing it up to our field of vision…closer…closer…until the inevitable BANG of the gun going off occurs, implying suicide. That’s one surefire way to break the 4th Wall!
4. A VERY GRAVE FAMILY REUNION
“Taphophobia” is defined as being a “persistent and abnormal fear of being buried alive.” Although the condition itself is deemed rare, we can all agree that being buried alive is one of the most horrible things that could happen to a person. How about being buried alive with your parents, who have been long dead, after being murdered in front of your eyes as a child?
Combine this with having a good and thorough beating against your parents’ hallowed gravestone and seeing their bodies exhumed, and you’ve got total nightmare on your hands! That’s one of the things that happens to Bruce Wayne in Justice League: Doom. Not only is that a horrific concept, it is also incredibly gross. We couldn’t think of a worse family reunion! How does Bats get into and out of this plight? You’ll have to watch the movie to see!
3. THE MOST METAL INTRO EVER
Justice League Dark is our absolute, hands-down, most favorite JLA movie to date, and the intro scene is one of the countless reasons why it holds such a special place in our hearts. The world has been infected by dark magic, and confused souls are running around causing mayhem of the most extreme kinds.
We’re not sure what’s more “metal” — to quote the legend himself, Walter Flanagan; the crazed woman hitting demons with her car like she’s in GTA; the bodies Superman finds in the shed; or, the decision Batman has to make on the top of that church. Then, there’s the music itself, which is a fabulous mix of modern style dub step that is not only tolerable, but catchy. We could watch this intro over and over, but its metal may melt child-like faces just a tad too much!
2. HELLO, GIRLS
Continuing with Justice League Dark is one of our favorite scenes in American animated history involving some of our favorite DC characters, John Constantine and Zatanna Zatara. Having met up with a few unexpected sidekicks on her way to the magical “House of Mystery” to do the usual evening activities — you know, put on a show, greet fans, save the world from demons — Zee runs into a windstorm that sweeps her into the front door of the house and the awaiting arms of John.
Actually, it was more like Constantine landing on top of Zatanna, with his face planting directly into her corset! What an awkward way for exes to get reacquainted with each other. “Zee, are you alright?” John has the courtesy to ask. “Yeah, as soon as you get off me!”
1. BATS VS. POOP MONSTER
You read that right, ladies and germs — Batman versus a monster made of human waste. This memorable scene is also from Justice League Dark, and is simultaneously disgusting and hilarious. One of the most interesting things about the Poop Monster incident is the way that Bats responds to it, like it was just another foe to take down on another day on the job being a superhero.
“Poop Monster, you say? I am The Batman, nothing can phase me, especially with all my nifty gadgets and knowledge.” This scene is beautifully culminated when B-man succeeds in killing the monster, with it exploding all over the room and his surrounding companions, two of whom are Boston “Deadman” Brand and John Constantine. “Whoa, sh*t’s really hit the fan!” “Ya just had to go there, didn’t ya Boston?!”
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