WARNING: The following article contains spoilers for the Doom Patrol Season 1, streaming now on DC Universe.
Doom Patrol has been a perfect blend of action and comedy, staying true to the essence of the DC comics. One thing the DC Universe streaming service nailed is the very eccentric vibe of the property, which may well be the most standout feature of the 15 episodes comprising the first season.
With that in mind, let's look at the weirdest moments we were treated to thanks to Niles Caulder's crew of reluctant heroes, their quaint band of enemies and some of the most unique bystanders we've ever witnessed in the realm of superhero television.
ENTERING THE FARTING DONKEY
In the early half of the season, Mr. Nobody sucks Cloverton, Ohio into a vortex, leaving the Patrol without a home. The town's been marooned in an alternate dimension where Nobody has the citizens living out a false reality, all while continuing to torture the Chief.
Luckily, it turns out the portal to this dimension is through the throat of the farting donkey that debuted in the pilot. In the second episode, "Donkey Patrol," after Jane was spat out by the creature, the Patrol finds a way to enter its throat to try to bring everyone back. They do so and, thanks to Larry's Negative Spirit, the town was spat back out sans Niles. Still, we just couldn't shake the image of the team inside the donkey's throat trying to find Cloverton, navigating it like a sloppy, wet tunnel.
THE SEX PATROL
In "Penultimate Patrol," the second-to-last episode of the season, the team finds out, courtesy of Danny the Street, Niles is being held in the White Space. This is the dimension Nobody creates his worlds from and, thankfully for them, the Patrol has Flex Mentallo, who can literally flex his muscles to transport them there.
It goes pleasantly awry, though, when he flexes the wrong muscle and gives the entire team screaming orgasms. It's more hilarious than sultry because it really is uncontrollable, and with everyone on Danny also climaxing, it turns out to be the biggest party on the block. What tops the scene off is Cliff, as he's a robot, ends up faking his in ridiculous fashion just to join the chorus of those experiencing unbridled ecstasy.
THE VERMIN MAKE OUT SESSION
In the finale, "Ezekiel Patrol," Nobody recruits a cockroach, Ezekiel, and prophetic rat, Admiral Whiskers, into his new coalition so they can hold Niles' daughter, Dorothy, hostage on Danny. She powers them up to a kaiju-size threat, though, causing them to turn on Nobody, recognizing they don't need him to be monsters anymore.
However, as they crush the buildings on Danny, the violence turns both on and the creatures engage in a feverish make out session. What makes this hot and heavy scene so interesting and yucky at the same time is Cliff's stuck in Whiskers' intestines and has to climb out to enter Ezekiel's gut, where the rest of the team is, so they can be teleported together back to the real world. It's a disturbing scene with a lot of shots of a rodent's stomachs, as well as lots of unsavory tongue and saliva action.
EVERY SCENE WITH ANIMAL-VEGETABLE-MINERAL MAN
In the pilot, we see Nobody's transformation thanks to Baron Von Fuchs being disturbed thanks to Niles, thus turning him into a freak. Eventually, when the Patrol digs deeper decades later, they start a war in Paraguay at the Fuchtopia facility where a tourist known as Steve Larson is also disturbed. This leads to another botched experiment in a chamber, turning him into the Animal-Vegetable-Mineral Man.
Sporadically throughout the season, after the enhancement procedure tanked, we see the mismatched fusion of animal, vegetable and mineral losing his mind as society fails to understand Steve's predicament. He's always on the news for crimes against humanity, culminating in an assassination attempt on his life which he survives in laugh-out-loud fashion, giving us some of the show's biggest comedic relief moments.
THE BUTTS ARE LOOSE
In Episode 12, "Cyborg Patrol," the Patrol go to rescue Cyborg from the Ant Farm (the Bureau of Normalcy's prison). While his dad Silas fools the government agency into thinking he's there on behalf of S.T.A.R. Labs, Cliff and Rita poke around the place, realizing other metahumans are being experimented on. While Vic's rescue is occurring, Larry, who was a lab rat there when he first became the Negative Man, frees all the inmates in revenge.
This leads to carnivorous butts with legs and teeth going on a rampage, attacking and eating all the soldiers at the Ant Farm. As the military heads spread word "the butts are loose," the Patrol is taken aback because, while they've seen a lot of odd stuff, this certainly stands high on the list as the butts rabidly swarm and devour the sinister array of workers at the facility.
NILES' CAVEWOMAN FETISH
Episode 10, "Hair Patrol," gives us deeper insight into Niles' backstory and, here, we find out his shocking adventures in the '40s working for the Bureau of Oddities as a cryptozoologist. After being attacked by a Wendigo, Niles was left for dead, only to be taken in by a cavewoman, Slava. They formed a bond as she taught Niles over the years to hunt and become a caveman.
After Niles sees her harnessing mystical gateways, he realizes there's more to life than science, and, having fallen in love, they sleep together in a scene that's as uncomfortable as it is romantic. In short, it's two very hairy people having sex, and is not the sexy scene you'd associate with your usual superhero shows. The series clearly takes digs at these kinds of shows here, having fun and reminding us even Neanderthals have needs that need to be satisfied!
THE BEARD HUNTER'S BIG MEAL
In that same episode, we encounter Ernest Franklin, the Beard Hunter, who's hired by the Bureau to track Niles down. He infiltrates Doom Manor and consumes some of Caulder's facial hair from the sink drain as a means to track him, but the show holds nothing back as we see him literally guzzling the scum from Chief's pipelines.
It really turns your stomach, and minutes later when Cyborg catches him, he also sucks up some of the hero's stubble so he can disarm his defense systems and escape. Honestly, on paper this might sound like a cool power, but seeing it in motion twice really can lead to you retching because Ernest definitely has the most disgusting ability we've ever seen, and the show doesn't sugarcoat it with its camera angles as the Hunter feasts on his facial hair.
Streaming now on DC Universe, Doom Patrol stars Brendan Fraser as Cliff Steele, Matt Bomer as Larry Trainor, Diana Guerrero as Crazy Jane, Alan Tudyk as Mr. Nobody, April Bowlby as Rita Farr, Joivan Wade as Vic Stone, and Timothy Dalton as Niles Caulder.