Despite what you may have heard, the real threat to America may not be illegal immigration, same-sex marriage or even Obamacare. No, it turns out that it’s Robert Kirkman & Co.
In an editorial on FoxNews.com, Dr. Manny Alvarez asks, “Is watching The Walking Dead seriously hurting American society?” Before anyone has a chance to consider the question, Fox News Channel’s senior medical contributor answers with a confident “Yes.” And with that solved, Alvarez is free to focus on other pressing concerns, like the nature of Batman and Robin’s relationship, or, y’know, the dangers of socialized medicine or something. Then again, maybe not.
“Hate me all you want, or call me paranoid and misinformed,” he continues, just begging for a Rocky Horror-style audience response, “but there is one common theme that is pervasive in American pop culture today: violence. Even more specifically, zombie violence. The idea of a zombie-infested world inspires fantasies of monsters possessed by an uncontrollable rage to kill, and viewers get a thrill imagining what it would be like to participate in this new world order.”
Alvarez probably isn’t referring to President George H.W. Bush’s “new world order,” or even the capitalized conspiracy theory, but it’s difficult to say for sure.
In any case, the good doctor sees visions of the zombie apocalypse everywhere — in comics, in video games, in movies, in so-called “fun runs.” Heck, the undead have even infiltrated scientific studies from the National Institutes of Health and the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention. There’s no escaping these lumbering, moral-fabric devouring hordes!
“Give me a break,” Alvarez writes before putting his reputation on the line with his boldest declaration to date.” As a doctor and scientist, I know one thing for sure: When you’re dead, you’re dead.”
And then he arrives at the point he’s toiled so tortuously to reach: “With this country heading towards a socialized system of government, in which officials don’t want you to think or focus on what is important for your own personal growth, I’m sure they’re more than happy to let you obsess over something as stupid as zombies.”
Alvarez writes, having just obsessed over something as stupid as zombies …
(via TV Overmind)