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Ten Goofiest Moments in the First Ten Issues of Green Lantern

by  in Comic News Comment
Ten Goofiest Moments in the First Ten Issues of Green Lantern

With the release this weekend of Green Lantern, I figured I’d devote two days to goofy moments related to the film’s release. Here is a link to yesterday’s piece, where we looked at the Hard Travelin’ Heroes era of Green Lantern/Green Arrow. Today, let’s look at the first ten issues of Green Lantern.

All ten issues were written by John Broome and all ten issues were penciled by Gil Kane (although a few other artists pitched in for one of the stories in #4) and Joe Giella inked most of the stories, with Murphy Anderson inking a handful.

As always, this is all in good fun. I don’t mean any of this as a serious criticism of the comics in question. Not only were these writers certainly never imagining people still reading these comics decades after they were written, great comics often have goofy moments (Kirby/Lee’s Fantastic Four is one of the best comic book runs of all-time and there were TONS of goofy stuff in those 100 plus issues!).

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Imagine if modern Hal Jordan was given opportunities like this bit from #3?


I think Antonio Cromartie would be given a run for his money (just because I am a sweetheart, I will give you this link to explain the Cromartie joke to non-NFL fans).

This trick from #1 is a neat one. I have no idea how it is supposed to work (I just imagine a guy spinning the door like mad and then changing his clothes in front of everyone), but it sounds good!


In #3, one of the few good guys from Qward looks to Green Lantern for help. Luckily, for some reason, a newspaper columnist wrote about the Hal/Carol/Green Lantern love triangle.


How hard up is that newspaper for gossip?

In #5, I just adore the one guy at this party where Hector Hammond is making a scene…


“He’s mysterious.”
“He just showed up recently.”
“He is really smart.”
“I don’t like him.”

Awesome.

I love this bit from #7 where we learn that Sinestro has a predisposition to be evil…


So the dude’s name is Sinestro, he has a pre-disposition to be evil due to a quirk in his brain, and you STILL make him a Green Lantern? Good job, Guardians!

Who would ever want to escape from Sinestro’s energo-sac?


In #5, Hector Hammond discovers a meteor that evolves things around it. This leads to two hilarious bits.

1. The professor he shows it to is like, “This can’t be real! These are how plants will look like in a thousand years!” How the hell does he know that?

but even more hilarious…

2. Is Hammond going “undercover” as a student but not bothering to cover up his gray hair. And the professor still falls for it!


I love the idea (from #1) that Carol just calls up her dad, “Hey, can I marry Green Lantern?”


And she takes the idea ever further by determining that she will ask this guy she barely knows to marry her in issue #3!!!



At least she and Green Lantern at least do have some sort of relationship. What is Hal thinking in #6 talking about marriage like that?


And I love his logic that her lying about being with Green Lantern is some coup for him.

10. The Silver Age was anal, too…

In #10, we actually see an entire issue devoted to Hal explaining how he came up with the oath…


after three stories…


Yikes.

9. Can’t argue with the logic…

In #9, reporter Sue Williams is positive that Hal’s younger brother Jim is Green Lantern, and she goes to great lengths to prove it…



but that’s nothing compared to what her plan is…


Yes, she’ll marry him if that’s what it takes to find out his identity!

You might think that that is a bad reason to marry someone, but in the Silver Age of DC it is practically the most romantic reason. After all, Iris West absolutely despised Barry Allen and she still married him (and by the way, Sue did, indeed, end up marrying Jim. Somehow she has not been killed off yet.)

8. Thanks for the favor!

In #1, Hal Jordan almost crashes his plane…


we then learn it is because the Guardians were making an “energy duplicate” of him…


Good job avoiding interfering with his normal life, Guardians! You almost killed the guy!!

7. Just trust me, it worked…

This is an…interesting use of Hal’s powers in #7.



“Yeah, the Carbon dioxide moved the..uh…atomic…uhm…mechanism of the clock, yeah, that’s the ticket!”

6. Judicious use of editor’s notes

I love this bit in #6 where Julie Schwartz quickly explains away a power of Hal’s RIGHT AFTER he uses it!!!


Hilarious.

Go to the next page for the top five!

5. Speaking of amusing editor’s notes…

So, in #1, the Guardians erase Hal’s memory of them (for some weird reason that is never really explained)…


So that’s on page 9. On page 12, they recap what we read THREE PAGES EARLIER!!


I know kids are dumb, but they’re not THAT dumb, are they? Wait, never mind, don’t answer that!

4. Carol “Fickle” Ferris

In #4, some bad guy is impersonating Green Lantern at a party…


Damn, that’s cold, Carol!

3. Not quite as cold as the way Julie Schwartz talks about Carol…

Check out how Schwartz explains Carol Ferris to new readers in #7…


“Yeah, she’s his boss, but really, who’s kidding who? Her role is in the kitchen…wait, I mean…her role is as Green Lantern’s romantic interest.”

2. This is the guy who took out pretty much the entire Green Lantern Corps?

Early on, Hal was far less of a bad ass, as seen by this bit from #5…


and this one from #7…


“Green Lantern is vulnerable to the color yellow…and his own incompetence!”

1. I hope the DC relaunch somehow uses this plot…

From #7, I think I’ll just let it speak for itself…