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Dark FANtasies: 18 Supervillains Fans Have Dirty Thoughts About

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Dark FANtasies: 18 Supervillains Fans Have Dirty Thoughts About

Diabolical and morally bankrupt, supervillains belong in prison or straight-jacketed in an asylum. With their heinous deeds and vulgar intentions, they deserve our contempt. Murderous though they may be, some supervillains make us want to invite them upstairs and into our bedrooms. While some superheroes inspire amorousness with their good deeds, great looks and heroism, supervillains appeal to our basest instincts in darker ways.

RELATED: FANtasies: 15 Dirty Thoughts Fans Have About Superheroes

We’ve compiled a list of desirable baddies who, for one reason or another, inspire dirty thoughts. With their risqué costumes and inhumanly toned physiques, the baddies on this list are exciting in more ways than one. In some instances, their looks alone draw you in. In others, it’s a specific superpower that scandalizes readers’ imaginations. It could just be the terrifying glint in their eye. After all, the crazy ones are always the most exciting to spend the night with.

18. TALIA AL GHUL

talia-leviathan

Talia Al Ghul’s mother was a hippie and her father was notorious longevity serum abuser Ra’s Al Ghul. Talia grew up to be the devastatingly beautiful leader of the League of Assassins. A one-time temporary head of Lexcorp, she is the businesswoman at the head of Leviathan, as well as a member of The Society. People will overlook a lot to spend an evening with someone as bold and as gorgeous as Talia Al Ghul. Just ask Batman.

Her fling with Bruce Wayne brought Damian Wayne into the world and eventually takes him out of it. Talia gets the Heretic, a clone of her son Damian, to murder the real Damian, just to spite her once “Beloved,” Batman. Few folks think “marriage material” when they think of Talia Al Ghul; you certainly wouldn’t want to spend forever with her in the Lazarus Pits. So keep it casual.

17. THE JOKER

The Joker is a mutated clown-faced killer, and yet his power of persuasion is undeniable. Arguably the most fascinating of all supervillains, the Clown Prince of Crime is Batman’s most formidable foe — a green-haired charismatic anarchist. If we’re being honest, we’ve all caught ourselves wondering whether that bright red lipstick is the kind that doesn’t kiss off. His appeal is broad.

The Joker successfully wooed Harley Quinn away from her psych work and into a life of crime. The way he threatens Batman is at times positively flirtatious. Who is the Joker, really? Nobody knows for sure. He constantly changes his story in order to serve his latest twisted designs. Is he really just the acid-scarred leader of the Red Hood Gang or is he some kind of supernatural horror? One thing’s for sure: once he gets in your head, it’s nearly impossible to shake him.

16. DIAMONDBACK (RACHEL LEIGHTON)

Diamondback II Rachel Leighton

Rachel Leighton, who goes by Diamondback, is perhaps best known for dating Captain America. The Serpent Society sent her to kill MODOK. Captain America appeared, and, as they say, it was love at first fight. She has no superpowers — odd for a supervillain, but she isn’t your average baddie. She is an Olympic athlete in peak physical shape.

Diamondback is at her best when she’s battling her nemesis Snapdragon. She is not the only member of B.A.D. Girls, Inc. and the Serpent Society on this list, and for good reason. Some of Marvel’s most desirable characters belong to those groups. She can hold her own in a fistfight, and her weapon of choice is a throwing knife. That requires some serious hand-eye coordination, always a good thing in a potential paramour. And did we mention how freakin’ fit she is? No wonder fans can’t stop thinking about her.

15. KRAVEN THE HUNTER

Sergei Kravinoff’s Russian accent, augmented strength, and love of skintight leopard-prints are all perks. In his classic costume, he sports a vest that flaunts his perfect abs. So why do readers catch themselves daydreaming about going skin-to-skin with The Hunter? Forget about his serum-enhanced strength, abs and agility for a moment. If Fifty Shades-style kink’s your thing, he’s an expert with whips and restraints.

If you’d prefer a more sensual approach, consider this: Kraven’s tracking skills are extremely refined. To be a good tracker, you need to have precise senses, and you need to be willing to use all of them. Translation: like all great lovers, he’s into sights, sounds, smells, tastes and feels. Afterwards, as you’re lounging in his decked-out lion’s den, ask nicely and he might entertain you with thickly accented stories of epic hunts on the Sahara. Maybe you can even get him to trash talk Spider-Man.

14. LIVEWIRE

Livewire

In the comics, Livewire is a metahuman, born with electrical powers. Conversely, the Arrowverse’s Livewire gets her powers in a helicopter crash. Since she first appeared in the DCAU, though, let’s stick with its version of events. Radio DJ Leslie Willis made a name for herself by courting controversy. Lex Luthor was a big fan of her show. Superman wasn’t.

One night at a rock concert that she had organized in Centennial Park, an electrical storm swept through. Willis was on stage when lightning struck the radio tower, electrocuting her and transforming her into Livewire, a blue-haired being with powers to manipulate electricity. For sweet tunes, scandalous stories, and an altogether shockingly good time, why not give Livewire a call? On second thought, phone calls and electrical surges don’t always get along, so maybe try texting instead.

13. LOKI

Loki Valentines and close up split image

Loki the Trickster god is the hottest of the Norse gods — smooth, handsome, and fueled by indignation. Son of a Frost Giant, Loki has a cosmos-sized chip on his shoulder about being abandoned and raised among Asgardians. Odin made it clear he didn’t really belong. He’ll never measure up, so the way he figures it, why not just end it all? The smirk perpetually on his face tells a lot about the designs he has on everyone and everything around him.

Loki works tirelessly to bring about Ragnarok. He’s covetous, dangerous, and cruel, but he’s also slick, charming, and flirtatious. Plus, his powers are nearly unmatched. Teleportation, shapeshifting, eldritch energy blasts, freakin’ molecular rearrangement, and even levitation — Loki can do it all. What else can he do? You’d be lying if you said you never wondered.

12. THE ENCHANTRESS (DC COMICS)

June Moone The Enchantress DC Comics

The Enchantress is a magical entity that takes possession of the lovely June Moone. On her own, the Enchantress is one purely evil phantasm, truly vile. In Moone’s body, though, the Enchantress is a sight to behold. Moone used to be an artist. Now, with the Enchantress’ powers, she paints with reality itself. With Moone as her host, the Enchantress can spawn clones of herself.

What do you imagine it would take to convince her to experiment with the other June Moones and you? Given the fact that the Enchantress is slowly driving Moone insane, her situation is likely to be of the “hit it and quit it” variety, anyway, so it couldn’t hurt to ask. Since the Enchantress is a member of the Suicide Squad, perhaps you might consult Harley Quinn for advice. Maybe she could put in a good word for you. Who knows?

11. LOBO

Lobo Flexing

To put it mildly, Lobo is a motorcycle-riding, chain-smoking troublemaker. He’s a Czarnian, the last of his kind, but only because he killed off the others. A parody of grittiness, Lobo is excess personified, perpetually intoxicated and out of control. Why would you want to jump his bones? If you like bad boys, Lobo is as bad as they come. Maybe you can get him to take you for a ride on his SpazFrag666. You’ll first need to convince him not to kill you, though.

The last of a dying breed (he made sure of that), a true rebel, muscular, red-eyed, and profane, Lobo combines the alien sex appeal of Superman with the gruff machismo of Wolverine. Getting with Lobo is probably like scoring with a rockstar. Furthermore, be warned that he smells like cigar smoke and booze. That can be a dealbreaker for some folks, and a turn-off for others.

10. BLACK MAMBA

Black Mamba and Deadpool

Before Roxxon Oil microchipped her brain and transformed her into Black Mamba, Tanya Sealy was a call girl. A member of the Serpent Society, as well as a member of the salaciously branded trio B.A.D. Girls, Inc., Black Mamba is a telepath, a hypnotist and the wielder of the mystical Dark Force.

Perhaps most scandalizing of all, she has the power to go into your mind and use your secret fantasies and worst nightmares for her own ends. In other words, she’s a woman who has many ways of getting what she wants. Then again, even if she didn’t have powers and if all she had going for her were her looks and personality, Black Mamba would probably still earn a spot on this list.

9. MISTER SINISTER

mister sinister

Mister Sinister starts out as a cloning-obsessed geneticist named Dr. Nathaniel Essex. Under Apocalypse’s influence, he thinks about the ins-and-outs of boot-knocking on the regular, as evidenced by his desire to trick Cyclops into sleeping with a clone of Jean Grey in order to breed a super-mutant. As Mister Sinister, he uses genetic engineering to give himself virtual immortality. Basically, he can transfer his mind into a new body at any time via cloning.

So why on Earth would you want to go to bed with Mister Sinister? On account of his virtual immortality, he’s pretty much always in perfect shape. Have you seen how his muscles bulge through his suit? (They’re great distractions from his creepy-looking red eyes.) Then there’s his superhuman stamina! Look, Mister Sinister is probably a lot of fun, just steer clear of the topic of genetic manipulation, unless you want to be bored to death.

8. MADAM MEDUSA

Today we know Medusa as the ginger queen of the Inhumans, but she first appeared in Fantastic Four #36 in March 1965 as a flavor-of-the-week enemy with “unconquerable hair.” While her stint as a villain was later retconned away as a bout of amnesia, Madam Medusa remains unforgettable. Who wouldn’t want to lounge in luxury by her side? What makes her irresistible as a potential partner?

For one thing, you wouldn’t have to worry about being discovered (and promptly destroyed) by Black Bolt. Secondly, you wouldn’t know it from watching Inhumans on ABC, but Medusa has control of each individual strand of her super-durable prehensile hair. Imagine the things she might do with it! Finally, if you’re a bondage fan, that hair of hers could save you some real money. High-quality, friction-friendly rope, whips and tassels ain’t cheap!

7. LEX LUTHOR

Lex Luthor Split Image (1)

Wealthy beyond comparison, Lex Luthor is the amoral businessman who owns Lexcorp. He’s in love with himself and demands obedience and respect from his subordinates. A begrudging champion of the human race, Luthor sees Superman as both a threat to life on Earth and an impediment to humanity’s self-determination. Luthor is 6′ 2”, striking, and a genius. He is literally all that is Man.

If Luthor fancies you, he has thought through his designs, accounting for every contingency. He talks a big game but he backs it up, too. Luthor, more than anyone else on this list, understands the transactional logic of a one night stand, not to mention luxurious accommodations and high-tech toys. That said, his narcissism can be a bit much. After he rocks your world, he’ll probably tell you all about how he did it, as if you weren’t there the whole time. Still worth it.

6. MOONSTONE

Dr Karla Sofen Moonstone

Dr. Karla Sofen gets her superpowers from a Kree lifegem that she stole from the original Moonstone, Lloyd Bloch. You see, Dr. Sofen was Bloch’s shrink. She coerced him into giving up the gem and its corrupting influence. She then snatched up the gem and became the new Moonstone. Talk about a violation of doctor-patient privilege!

So, why can’t you stop thinking about Moonstone, aside from the fact that she looks like a supermodel? She is driven by her passions and given to short intense flings. So there’s the old-fashioned appeal of pursuing a fickle, wild heart. Plus, with the gem’s power, she can fly, become intangible, and emit light, energy and lasers from her hands. Presumably, she can turn an ordinary rendezvous in the dark into a private psychedelic lightshow, if she so wished.

5. THE RIDDLER

With a penchant for concocting elaborate scenarios, the Riddler is a real headcase. Formerly an employee of Wayne Enterprises, Mr. E. Nygma loves a good brainteaser. His original question-mark spangled jumpsuit didn’t do him any favors, but over the years, the Riddler has become quite the snazzy dresser. He makes that green bowler hat, matching three-piece suit, and gold cane work. Then again, it’d probably look better piled on the floor at the foot of the bed.

What’s so bedevilling about the Riddler? You never know whether he’s on your side or just toying with you. One minute he’s aiding one of Batman’s ongoing investigations by feeding him riddle-wrapped clues, and the next he’s plotting a takeover of the entire city of Gotham. In other words, you know he likes to play games, so he’s probably down to roleplay.

4. THE MAGUS

The Magus split image

An insane purple-skinned embodiment of Adam Warlock’s future self, the Magus is a terrifying cult leader. His Church of Universal Truth expanded from a little-known planet called Sirus X to encompass thousands of worlds. Its abiding creed was that the Magus was to be served, praised and worshipped as a god. He’s an embodiment of megalomaniacal madness.

Seen from another perspective, however, the Magus is a bad boy with a spiritual side. Unlike many of the names on this list, there’s still a glimmer of goodness in him. Sure, he is completely bonked in the head and unconventionally handsome, but when was that ever a deal breaker? Besides, you just know he would be down for some mind-bending pillow talk about the nature of the universe, and what’s hotter than that?

3. TALA

Tala and Phantom Stranger

Tala, the Queen of Evil, is a memorable enemy of the mysterious Phantom Stranger. Making her first appearance in Phantom Stranger Vol. 2 #4 in December 1969, Tala brings her prey to their knees by harnessing the intoxicating power of Chaos.  She uses seduction as a weapon against her foes — yup, it’s literally her primary superpower, and all of her magical abilities serve to make her desirable.

Why does she end up on your mind when your mind’s in the gutter? That dress could be part of it. Then there’s the fact that she’s a shapeshifter. Like Mystique, she can become anybody. So, not only is she skilled in the art of seduction, she is everyone’s type. If you haven’t had a dirty thought about Tala, you haven’t read enough Phantom Stranger comics.

2. MING THE MERCILESS

Ming the Merciless split image

Elderly and bewhiskered, Ming The Merciless seems like an odd choice for jousting with between the sheets. The Emperor of Planet Mongo sips tea as he sits on a golden throne with a dragon insignia. So why would anybody want to seal the deal with old Ming? Two words: unlimited resources. Flash Gordon’s nemesis has intergalactic sugar daddy written all over his shiny bald head.

The guy has some serious spending power. Just look at the endless armies and fleets of starships under his command. Plus, those long whiskers of his look like they could be fun to hold onto when things get hot and heavy. Be warned. Ming is a total horndog, leering incessantly at the lovely Dale Arden, the go-to damsel in Flash Gordon comics. He might be hard to please.

1. LADY DEATHSTRIKE

Lady Deathstrike split image

Yuriko Oyama, aka Lady Deathstrike, is the daughter of Lord Dark Wind. Following her father’s death by her own hand, Lady Deathstrike became CEO of his company, Oyama Heavy Industries. With those impossibly sharp retractable talons for fingernails, she is one of the most recognizable members of Donald Pierce’s private military group, the Reavers. She is also a notorious assassin with some incredible bio-mechanical augmentations, including the ability to access data directly from computer systems.

That’s all really cool, but why would you want to get physical with her in any context, let alone an amorous one? To start, she’s alluring. Moreover, her technologically enhanced immunity to mind-control has some intriguing implications. Lady Deathstrike does what she wants, no exceptions. That’s hot. Plus, she is probably, like, crazy good at video games. What more could you want?

Which of these villains — or any others — would you want to get with? Let us know in the comments!

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