Saving ordinary citizens from giant monsters and rampaging robots is the name of the game when you’re a superhero. Sure, maybe you’d rather spend your time lounging on a beach and drinking margaritas, but who’s going to defeat that megalomaniacal dictator who wants to fight you and nobody else? Yes, it’d be easy to send one your fellow heroes, who may or may not be a god, down to smite your enemies, but there’s always going to be the pesky nagging sensation, otherwise referred to as personal responsibility.
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Even so, you wouldn’t believe just how lazy certain super heroes can be, or not just lazy, but downright promiscuous. Plenty of them are constantly engaged in a healthy love life, and then some, sleeping with nearly everyone under the sun, so long as they have two legs. Heck, hooking-up with a distressed damsel, or even an assassin who wants to kill you in your sleep, is infinitely superior to suiting up in spandex and getting punched in the face. Don’t get us wrong, they’ll definitely save you if push comes to shove, but let’s just say there are other things they’d rather be doing. We’re looking at 15 superheroes who would prefer to hook-up with you than fight to save you.
15 IRON MAN
The genius, playboy, philanthropist Tony Stark, or Iron Man when he likes to get attention, has a list of romantic rendezvous longer than Mr. Fantastic’s arm. It doesn’t hurt matters that Stark spends plenty of time globetrotting, running into all kinds of people, for business and pleasure.
These days, Pepper Pots is his primary squeeze, but that hasn’t stopped the Golden Avenger from bedding anyone and everyone, ranging from the villainess Madame Masque to even heroes like the Black Widow and the Wasp. Nobody is off limits in Tony’s mind and even though he wears one of the most expensive and powerful technologically advanced armors in the history of the world, his adventures are distractions to fill up the day. What Stark would really love, besides figuring up some super science, is to lay back with a glass of scotch in a one hand and a supermodel in the other.
14 CONSTANTINE
John Constantine is one of the highest-ranking mages in the DC Universe. That said, he’d be totally fine with spending all his time in a bar or hooking up with people if he could. Oftentimes Constantine finds himself thrust into dangerous situations, not because he’s actively looking for them like other superheroes, but because he has awful luck. Demons, spirits, and monsters, everyone wants a piece of the legendary John Constantine. He’s the man who’s defeated the Devil with only a few clever words and some sleight of hand.
Still, Constantine’s other skills lay in smoking, drinking and finding individuals to pass the time with. Women, men and occasionally demons, it doesn’t matter to John. What does matter is that you’re easy to get along with and not looking to bring any trouble or drama into his life. A lazy hero, Constantine would much rather have one-night stands than get punched.
13 WONDER WOMAN
Princess Diana of Themyscira was born thanks to Queen Hippolyta, some clay, and the magic of Zeus. It’s a complicated story that only gotten more convoluted over the years. What matters is that Wonder Woman was birthed into creation and would change the world forevermore. While on Paradise Island, though she trained to be a masterful combatant, peace and love were more her jam; the Amazons themselves were champions of peace and avoided conflict whenever possible.
When Diana made the journey to Man’s World, she did so under the ambassadorship of love, not war. Wonder Woman is known for her unquestionable love for nearly every person on the planet, but evil must be fought sometimes. In a perfect world, Wonder Woman would be successful, bring peace to Man’s World, and wouldn’t have to save anyone. Saving people usually involves punching; Diana would rather love someone than partake in violence.
12 STARFOX
A former Avenger, Starforx, or Eros of Titan, is the brother to the Mad Titan Thanos. While Starfox might not share his psychopathic brother’s proclivities to try and murder everyone, Eros is a sketchy character in his own right. Along with super strength and flight, Starfox also has the ability, in layman’s terms, to seduce almost anyone he wishes. It’s gotten him in trouble on multiple occasions too, especially once with She-Hulk. It’s unlikely Starfox doesn’t understand Earth customs, but rather he chooses to make up his own rules.
Even though he was an Avenger, Starfox is not the kind of hero to go out of his way to fight you or fight someone for you. Rather, he’d be more than happy with settling things over a drink and then, whether you wanted it or not, seduce you into sleeping with him.
11 STAR-LORD
Peter Quill, otherwise known as Star-Lord, is the leader of his ragtag team the Guardians of the Galaxy. After getting shanghaied into space at a terribly young age, Peter was left to defend himself and make his way throughout the universe. During his many travels, he picked up the knack for stealing and generally just being a good con man. Saving people wasn’t really his thing, but sleeping with female beauties of differing neighboring races, very much was.
Even after becoming an official Guardian of the Galaxy and taking on the roll of the team’s leader, Peter is still oftentimes lazy, irresponsible, and wouldn’t be opposed to hooking up with you if it saved him the trouble of having to defend all of existence from Thanos again.
10 BLACK WIDOW
Natasha Romanov, the Black Widow, is as deadly an assassin as they come. Trained from an early age in the dreaded Red Room, she mastered the art of killing. However, it wasn’t only killing she learned. In becoming an expert spy, she picked up everything there was to know on subterfuge of every kind, including the ways in which to manipulate a person’s heart.
Despite have multiple relationships with the likes of Iron Man, Daredevil, Wolverine and the Winter Soldier, Natasha seems to prefer working in the shadows, disallowing emotion to get in the way. While she might be an extraordinarily skilled combatant, if she can get away with hooking up with you as opposed to fighting, she’ll likely do it. The way of the spy emphasizes deception as opposed to brute force.
9 WOLVERINE
Wolverine’s earned the recognition of being there best at what he does; he’s not just a skilled fighter. Despite going on and on about how he’s a loner with a tortured and horrible past, Wolverine (James Howlett) finds himself engaging in relationship after relationship. Granted, those little love-fests typically end in blood or carnage, but where fighting and beer aren’t getting the job done, hopping into the sack seems to be Logan’s M.O.
Logan’s dated or slept with a wide array of women, including Mariko Yashida, Storm, Mystique, Jean Grey, Domino, and more. While some of these women were also his enemies, it didn’t stop Wolverine from hooking up with them. If his history were any indication, despite what Logan would have you believe, the feral mutant definitely has no qualms hooking-up with you, rather than stabbing you with six adamantium claws.
8 HARLEY QUINN
If you don’t mind your hook ups to be with certifiably crazy women, then Harley Quinn is your girl! While definitely an oddball in her own right, these days, since she’s no longer working with The Joker, she’s mellowed out enough to make her somewhat reasonable.
People have a tough time seducing Harley, as she’s pretty guarded, but when she sets her eye on someone, like say Poison Ivy, watch out! Incredibly loyal, Harley would likely suggest to just spend the night in. You just know that if you spend a night on the town with Harley, trouble will undoubtedly ruin the evening, forcing her to hit someone over the head with that gigantic hammer she lugs around. Heck, she’s probably be content to have you lay on the couch and discuss your problems while she takes notes; anything to make her life less manic.
7 DAREDEVIL
Matt Murdock is a blind attorney during the day, but protects Hell's Kitchen at night dressed as his alter ego Daredevil. A hero with an impossibly bleak and depressing history, Daredevil is the hero who refuses to lie down; unless of course he’s lying down with gorgeous woman who may or may not be plotting to kill him. One of the most promiscuous superheroes in any universe, Daredevil gets around quite a bit. It generally works for him, until it doesn’t and whatever woman he’s sleeping with is either driven insane or murdered.
Even foes like Elektra and Echo, while they might be trying to destroy him, Daredevil insists on taking them to bed; the guy just can’t help himself!! Daredevil is one hero who’d certainly hook up with you and then completely fail at saving you altogether.
6 BATMAN
One of the most notorious billionaires in comic books, Bruce Wayne, the Batman, doesn’t spend all his time brooding and jumping over rooftops dressed as a giant bat. Maybe it’s the danger that women are attracted to with Batman, or maybe it’s the chiseled physique, but whatever it is, Batman is constantly finding himself hooking up with female heroes and villains.
That said, most of the villains he beds eventually end up trying to kill him. Yet if you’re a pretty and enigmatic damsel, then Batman is going to be torn between fighting you and sleeping with you. Furthermore, Batman can’t keep his identity secret from practically any woman he dates; he’s a long-term relationship kind of guy. Sure, Batman is going to save you if you’re in trouble, but he’d much rather show you around the Batcave and introduce you to some batarangs, if you get our meaning.
5 HUMAN TORCH
The hotheaded member (literally) of Marvel’s first family the Fantastic Four, Johnny Storm is known as the Human Torch. Capable of setting his entire body on fire, flying, and blasting opponents with intense fiery blasts, Johnny is a formidable and incredibly powerful superhero. However, despite being on a premiere superhero team, Johnny would rather be doing anything that didn’t involve intergalactic threats.
Completely okay with using his fame and powers to get him hot dates, Johnny is constantly finding women to bed, and celebrities no less. With a penchant for hooking up with supermodels, Johnny Storm brings all kind of meaning to his catchphrase “Flame On!” Still, even when he’d grown out of his adolescent desire to bed every beauty he laid eyes on, he’s been involved with plenty of relationships and with women of all species.
4 CATWOMAN
Oozing seduction in even her slightest movements, Selina Kyle, Catwoman, is one of the greatest thieves on the planet. A femme fatale, Catwoman forever captivates Batman, and any other man she crosses paths with, with her alluring figure. While Selina often gets involved in fisticuffs, as that’s what happens when you dress up as a cat and go around stealing jewelry in Gotham City, she’d be completely content with spending a night in and hooking up with her latest mark.
If you suddenly find yourself in the bedroom with Catwoman, odds are you’re going to wake up the next morning wondering where all your grandmother’s diamonds have scampered off. Catwoman would rather sleep with you, rather than fight you, or even save you. It’s all too much work and a girl’s got to get her beauty sleep.
3 BOOSTER GOLD
Michael Carter was born in the year 2442. After a botched attempt at becoming a successful football player, he stole some time travel technology from the 25th century and gave himself the name Booster Gold. Originally, his plan was to go back in time to the 20th Century and become a world-class hero, earning fame and fortune along the way. Life had a different set of plans for him; ever so reluctantly, he became a genuine superhero. Since his adventures involve time travel, his exploits are virtually unknown by the other superheroes and they think he’s a jerk and a showboat.
In his early days, Booster wasn’t the kind of guy who wanted to fight anyone, but rather smile for the cameras. Michael definitely would much rather hook-up with any one of his adoring fans (the few that there are) then do anything that involved personal risk or injury.
2 NIGHTWING
Formerly known as Robin, the Boy Wonder, Dick Grayson has matured since his younger days in green underwear. A dreamboat if ever there was one, Dick Grayson is known for choosing to be a lover over a fighter. He’s dated plenty of women in his day, breaking many hearts along the way. No one can get enough Dick, and his dancing around in the pale moonlight dressed in a skintight body suit certainly doesn’t help matters any.
Always getting into trouble with women, i.e. being involved in dubious love triangles with Barbara Gordon and Starfire, while Nightwing wouldn’t think twice about stopping you from getting mugged, he’d certainly ask for your number afterwards. When all is said and done, you’re never going to have your fill of Dick.
1 DEADPOOL
Deadpool goes to show that it’s not always looks that count, but what’s inside a person that matters. Though considering it’s Deadpool we’re talking about, what’s inside a person is lots of guts, up until he eviscerates them. While Wade Wilson might not be the prettiest boy in all the land, he certainly seems to have more flings than the average anti-hero. Wade has no real orientation, as it frequently fluctuates, leaving him to flirt with anyone he wants.
Even though Deadpool might be a mercenary for hire, there’s plenty of other things he’d choose to do if he could. As for Deadpool saving you from anything, that’s a pretty risky endeavor in and of itself, so perhaps it might be best to just hook up with the Merc With a Mouth. After all, there’s got to be a reason why ladies keeping popping into his romantic life.
Which of these characters would you love to be "saved" by? Let us know in the comments!