Although it might have seemed we were safe from another onslaught of political commercials until at least next spring, the Emperor's Committee to Destroy May the 4th has released an attack ad that would make Karl Rove proud.

"Every year on May the 4th, citizens gather in celebration of Jedi, rebels and the power of the Force," the narrator says solemnly. "The wear costumes, have parties and share pictures and greetings on their social networks. They say it's fun, but what aren't they telling you about May the 4th?"

A lot, it turns out. For starters, the rebels and Jedi are traitors, along with everyone who celebrates May the 4th. Oh, and wearing Jedi outfits is a crime under the Emperor's Subversive Apparel Act, so cut that out (especially those embarrassing rat tails).

In case you're foolish enough to disregard the warnings of the ad, StarWars.com has a guide to "How to Party Like an Ewok For May the 4th."