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I Love Ya But You’re Strange – That Time Wolverine “Fought” a Little Lisping Girl Robot Bomb

by  in Comic News Comment

Every installment of I Love Ya But You’re Strange I spotlight strange but ultimately endearing comic stories. Here is the archive of all the installments of this feature. Feel free to e-mail me at bcronin@comicbookresources.com if you have a suggestion for a future installment!

Today, in response to folks asking to see her on the Top Five Wolverine Female Friends list, I figured I’d spotlight the utterly bizarre (but awesome) character, Elsie Dee!

After a quick cameo at the end of Wolverine #37, we get a quick cameo of Elsie Dee and Albert, but Wolverine #38 (by Larry Hama, Marc Silvestri and Dan Green), first sees them in action, as they drive around robbing people…


We learn that this is all part of Donald Pierce’s evil plan, as he built a Wolverine robot to draw Wolverine into investigating, and then a cute lisping little girl android who would then have to be “saved” by Wolverine, only to then explode and destroy Wolverine…


I love how incompetent the Reavers are.

So anyhow, Elsie now improves herself and the robot Wolverine, who she names Albert…


At the end of Wolverine #38, Wolverine catches up to Albert and kicks his ass, but this leads to Elsie implementing her prime directive…



Storm is around, so at the start of Wolverine #39 (by Hama, Silvestri and Green), she tries to put out the fire, but Elsie has to stop her…


This leads to Wolverine having to literally walk through the fire to save the “innocent girl”…



Awesome artwork.

Go to the next page to see the heartwarming sequence where Elsie reveals her true nature to Wolverine, but Wolverine won’t accept that she is just her programming…




This really, really, REALLY should no work, but dammit, Hama is such a talented writer that it does.

So Wolverine helps Elsie try to fight her programming. Meanwhile, Albert is breaking into Radio Huts (Radio Shack substitute) to figure out the override code to transmit to her…




Again, there’s NO WAY that this should work so well, but darnit, Hama, Silvestri and Green pull it off!

The story doesn’t end there, though, oh no, no sirree.

In the next issue (Same creative team), Albert uses police equipment to rebuild himself…


Elsie has been hanging out with Wolverine and Jubilee…


But when Albert goes looking for her, she goes looking for him and they all end up in the sewers, where Sabretooth happens to be, and Wolverine ends up fighting Sabretooth in the sewers. Elsie wants to help, so she goes for help and runs into Cable because, well, it was the early 1990s, Cable and Wolverine would quite often just run into other characters in the oddest places. Cable wasn’t interested in getting involved with Elsie around, but this leads to one of the best sequences in the whole deal…


In the end, SHIELD shows up and captures Sabretooth and they’re all in a helicopter above New York City when Sabretooth makes one final attempt to kill Wolverine…



And in the end, Albert reunites with Elsie…


They continue to appear sporadically in other Hama Wolverine issues (and even in Generation X during Hama’s stint on that book), but they really haven’t been seen since. Tom Taylor, sounds like something for All-New WOlverine!

If anyone has a suggestion for a future edition of steange but awesome comics, drop me a line at bcronin@comicbookresources.com