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Died Laughing: 15 Of Deadpool’s Most Gruesomely Hilarious Kills

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Died Laughing: 15 Of Deadpool’s Most Gruesomely Hilarious Kills

Given the popularity of Fox’s rated R Deadpool film back in 2016, the character has had something of a pop-culture resurgence over the past year, with a whole new host of fans jumping on the Merc with a Mouth’s bandwagon, and older fans of the character climbing back on board, too. It’s not hard to zero in on the character’s appeal either, with his meta-humor, ultra-violence and rapid-fire quips making for a hero that exudes fun while bucking the traditional trends associated with the superhero genre.

RELATED: 15 Reasons You Actually HATE Deadpool

Fans are able to revel in the comically over-the-top violence present in Deadpool stories without having to worry about the sanctity of the central hero’s morality — and that’s pretty refreshing in a genre focused so heavily on making their hero the “good guy”. As a result, many of the atrocities committed by Wade Wilson in both the comics and the movie are frankly hilarious, using violence in a surprisingly creative way to serve as a punchline to a grim joke as opposed to a sobering moment of shock. In the spirit of this, let’s take a look at some of the most hilarious, inventive — and of course bloody — kills in Deadpool’s career.

15. RUNS OVER A GUY IN A ZAMOBNI

Deadpool-Zamboni

While there’s no shortage of hilarious deaths in 2016’s Deadpool movie, the infamous “zamboni scene” definitely stands out as one of the most memorable ones. After escaping unimaginable torture at the hands of the sadistic Ajax, the newly-powered Deadpool embarks on a manhunt for his arch-enemy, pressing the villain’s colleagues and allies for information before dispatching them in various grisly ways.

Perhaps the most unfortunate of these poor souls however, is an already-wounded henchman shown crawling his way across an ice rink — before the camera cuts to Deadpool tailing him in an ice resurfacer while taunting his potential future victim. The visuals are already darkly funny enough, but the fact that the scene cuts away before the violence actually occurs leaves audiences with a gruesome implication that really makes the joke hit hard.

14. ROASTS HOWARD THE DUCK ALIVE

Deadpool-Howard-Duck

Deadpool Kills the Marvel Universe follows a version of Deadpool who’s lost his mind after being brainwashed by Psycho Man, who’s unintentionally replaced the voices in Deadpool’s head with infinitely more murderous ones. Proceeding to kill every character in the Marvel Universe, Deadpool sets off on a brutal quest that’s intentionally more disturbing than funny, although that doesn’t mean the story is completely devoid of humor.

In one small panel for instance, we see a roasted Howard the Duck, as a news reporter comments that even the most innocuous Marvel characters can’t escape Deadpool’s wrath. The attention to detail in the panel is what makes the visual work so well, with the roasted Howard still sporting his classic detective-style trilby, his gaudy orange tie wrapped tightly around his beak, presumably to silence his screams. It’s a pretty dark moment to be sure, but that makes it no less hilarious.

13. SHOOTS A FAN OF THE STAR WARS PREQUELS

deadpool_star_wars

When Deadpool’s adventures bring him into contact with Headpool — the zombified head of an alternate Universe Deadpool — Wade decides to sell the creature to A.I.M., who want to use the head to create a powerful weapon. After being pursued by HYDRA agents, A.I.M. picks up Deadpool and set a course for their base.

Of course, with Wade Wilson on board, the ride doesn’t exactly go as smoothly as intended. After Deadpool references Return of the Jedi, one of the agents of A.I.M. comments that he prefers the prequels, listing off all the worst things about the prequels as the reasons he loves them. After an awkward pause, Deadpool blows his head off in a bloody display, before demanding that a nearby A.I.M. agent recite the words “Jar-Jar Binks is an abomination” — which he naturally does.

12. FILLS HITLER WITH HOLES

Deadpool-Hitler

In Brain Posehn and Gerry Duggan’s Deadpool #26, a time-traveling Wade must save Nick Fury from assassination in 1954 Los Angeles, with the issue adopting a more silver-age aesthetic that serves as a nice contrast to the violent, dark comedy in the issue itself. During the story, Hitler travels to the future to kill Fury following a humiliating defeat at the hands of the Howling Commandos in WWII.

Coming to blows with Fury, Deadpool, and later Cable, Hitler attacks the team in a mech, and an intense battle ensues. After subduing Hitler, the three heroes shred the dictator to pieces in a literal hail of bullets that reduces him to Swiss cheese. Not wanting to damage the timeline, Deadpool comes up with the idea of taking Hitler’s corpse back in time and making it look like a suicide, which the Germans clearly don’t buy given the corpse’s mangled condition.

11. EXECUTES AJAX MID-HERO SPEECH

deadpool_ajax

One of the things that made Deadpool such a hit with fans of the character was the way it poked fun at the superhero genre at large, purposely steering away from the moral sentimentality of most superhero stories in favor of a tone more fitting of the Merc with a Mouth. This is no better exemplified than in the scene that finally sees Wade’s arch-enemy Ajax at his mercy after beating him down.

Before he can kill him however, Colossus interrupts Wade to give a rousing speech about being a hero, making the right decision, and showing restraint in the face of vengeance. As the music builds, the movie suggests that Deadpool may be taking Colossus’ words to heart, before Deadpool unceremoniously shoots Ajax in the head, causing a disgusted Colossus to vomit. It’s hardly the grisliest death on the list, but it’s certainly one of the funniest.

10. BEHEADS HONEST ABE DURING A CAGE FIGHT

Deadpool-Abraham-Lincoln

After an absurdly patriotic sorcerer takes it upon himself to heal America by resurrecting all the country’s dead presidents, it’s up to Deadpool to clean up his mess after the zombified presidents decide that the best way to cure America is to simply kill everybody. Throughout the 6-issue story, Deadpool takes out dozens of the presidents in a plethora of creative ways, but one of the funniest scenes in the story sees Deadpool and a shirtless, rotting Abe Lincoln duke it out in a cage match.

The two men exchange heavy blows for a while, pummelling each other into oblivion, but little does Lincoln know that Deadpool is merely stalling while he waits for backup to arrive. Once his team tracks him down, Deadpool’s tag-team partner throws his katana into the ring, which Deadpool promptly uses to decapitate the 16th president of the United States.

9. BLOWS A HOLE THROUGH FLAG SMASHER’S FACE

Deadpool-Flag-Smasher

Though different characters have taken on the villainous role over the years, Flag Smasher is a terrorist whose aim is to destroy nationalism, patriotism, and the very concept of having countries. He also leads the terrorist organization known as ULTIMATUM in his bloody crusade.

Back in 2015, Marvel began to tease the impending death of Deadpool at the hands of the organization, and fans were surprised (or annoyed, depending on who you ask) when Marvel defied expectations by having Deadpool not only survive the battle, but slaughter every last member of ULTIMATUM, as well as Flag Smasher himself. After Deadpool blows a large hole through Flag Smasher’s face, readers are treated to a gruesome view of the inside of Flag Smasher’s head, which while grisly, is undoubtedly comical. After all, comedy is all about subverting expectations, and that’s exactly what Marvel did here.

8. SPELLS OUT “FRANCIS” IN HENCHMEN CORPSES

Deadpool-Francis

During Deadpool’s time as a guinea pig for cruel scientist and supervillain Ajax, Wade learns one of the few vulnerabilities of his arch-enemy is his real name. Learning that Ajax’s birth name is in fact Francis, it soon becomes apparent that Ajax’s change of name stems from the embarrassment associated with being named Francis, and this is something Deadpool doesn’t let go for the rest of the movie.

When Deadpool eventually tracks down Ajax, he catches the villain’s attention by slaughtering dozens of his henchmen in a brutal bloodbath, before arranging their corpses to spell out “FRANCIS”. Although Ajax can’t feel physical pain, it’s clear that this one stings more than any injury ever could, and the scene serves as a side-splitting culmination of the whole running gag.

7. BEHEADS THE HEADLESS HORSEMAN

Deadpool-Headless-Horseman

Upon realizing that the vicious cycle of violence and death within the Marvel Universe is based upon the fact that they’re all fictional characters, Deadpool hatches a plan to kill literature’s most beloved characters — giving modern writers nothing to base their work upon and thus erasing them from existence.

Deadpool brutalizes a wide variety of literary characters throughout his adventure, but his confrontation with the Headless Horseman is one of the more memorable deaths of the series. After running into what he thinks is the Headless Horseman, it soon turns out to be a very apologetic Brom Bones in disguise, avidly proclaiming that it was just a joke. Deadpool doesn’t see the funny side however, and beheads him, leaving his eyes and mouth filled with candles, granting Brom’s wish of becoming the Headless Horseman.

6. GIVES A MUTANT DINOSAUR A STOMACH ACHE

Deadpool-Mutant-Dinosaur

One of the best runs of Deadpool in a long, long time, Brian Posehn and Gerry Duggan’s take on the character was incredibly fun, inventive and of course, violent. Posehn and Duggan definitely started as they meant to go on with the series, with Deadpool’s first appearance in Deadpool #1 occurring in spectacularly gory fashion.

As a giant mutant dinosaur terrorizes Manhattan, the creature feels a sudden bout of indigestion, looking down to see a katana sticking out from his chest. As you could probably guess, the katana belongs to Deadpool, who slices the dinosaur from chest to stomach before announcing his presence by bursting forth from the dinosaur — along with the creature’s disgusting innards. After Deadpool’s glorious entrance, Thor also sheepishly steps out of the creature too, warning Deadpool not to tell anybody that they teamed up.

5. USES GEORGE WASHINGTON’S HEAD AS A FOOTBALL

Deadpool-George-Washington

Also taking place during the “Dead Presidents” arc, George Washington’s death is perhaps the most satisfying in the series. After killing Deadpool’s friend, S.H.I.E.L.D. Agent Emily Preston, Wade is fuelled by a raw anger in his final confrontation against Washington.

Removing the president’s arms, Deadpool gets in close enough to Washington to destroy the Necronomicon-looking book, effectively ending the zombie curse, before also cutting off his legs. When the president demands that Deadpool finish him off, he obliges, tearing off Washington’s head with his bare hands. It doesn’t end here however, as Deadpool kicks the freshly removed head towards the Lincoln Memorial, where it lands right in Lincoln’s crotch. The disembodied head of George Washington then concedes that due to his actions, this is a fate he ultimately deserves.

4. MICROWAVE’S HEADPOOL

Headpool-Microwave

In Cullen Bunn’s Deadpool Kills Deadpool series, an evil organization of Deadpools from across the multiverse team up to eradicate every last version of the character in existence, believing that doing so will result in the end of existence itself and in the opening scene of the story, we see an evil, leather-bound Deadpool take out one of his alternate-Universe counterparts.

Breaking into the home of Headpool — a talking, zombified Deadpool head — the evil Deadpool channels his inner Gremlins by shoving the head in a microwave and turning it on. As the two Deadpools exchange quips, Headpool begins to succumb to the microwave’s radiation, his skin bubbling violently before he completely explodes, leaving the microwave covered in a disgusting red and green paste.

3. SIGNING’ IN THE RAIN

Deadpool-Singin-In-Rain

Also taking place during the aforementioned Deadpool Kills Deadpool, two members of the Evil Deadpool Corps — Wolverinepool and Evil Deadpool — serenade Earth-616’s Deadpool with a gloriously bloody rendition of Singin’ in the Rain. Using his adamantium claws to decapitate one of the alternate Universe Deadpools, Wolverinepool impales the headless body on his claws and spins around a lamppost whilst showing off the newly decapitated head.

While this is going on, Evil Deadpool stands below the corpse as the blood spraying from its neck rains down on him, reciting his own twisted version of Singin’ in the Rain as he does so. Sure, these versions of Deadpool aren’t exactly the Wade Wilson we know and love, but they’re the still the Deadpool of their respective Universe, and this gruesomely creative death is very much in the spirit of the original character.

2. USES CAPTAIN NEMO TO BLOW UP THE LITTLE MERMAID

Deadpool-Little-Mermaid

After escaping Deadpool’s wrath earlier in the Deadpool Killustrated story, Captain Ahab from the classic novel Moby Dick once again crosses paths with the Merc with a Mouth, although he isn’t quite as lucky this time, finally facing his white whale. After hunting down Deadpool across time and space by teaming up with Captain Nemo, it turns out Deadpool is in fact the one hunting them down, posing as a lost-at-sea sailor to get on board their ship.

Once he’s brought onto the vessel, Deadpool proceeds to impale Ahab with his katanas before strapping Captain Nemo to an incredibly large torpedo. Spotting the Little Mermaid in the distance, Deadpool decides to kill two birds with one stone, firing the Nemo-torpedo directly at the mermaid, completely obliterating her upper half and leaving her disembodied tail to float gruesomely in the ocean.

1. EVISCERATES A JELLY BEAN-FILLED RONALD REAGAN

Deadpool-Reagan

Anyone with a penchant for presidential trivia will likely know that the 40th president of the United States, Ronald Reagan, had a strange affinity for jelly beans. This fact is used to great comic effect in “Dead Presidents”, after Deadpool tracks down Reagan on a Russian satellite 1,200 miles above Earth, as he attempts to impose a nuclear holocaust onto the unsuspecting planet.

Forced to engage in a fight with an angry horde of space-chimps, Deadpool finally hacks and slashes his way to the president, before attempting to take him on in a slugfest. Recognizing his opponent’s superior strength, Deadpool whips out his trusty katana and slices Reagan’s stomach open, resulting in a disturbingly colorful display of viscera and jelly beans. As Reagan laments the loss of his “precious jellies”, Deadpool shoots several holes in the satellite, sucking Reagan out into space — tearing him apart in the process.

Did we miss any of your favorite Deadpool kills? Let us know in the comments below!

Tags:
deadpool, x-men
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